Monday, May 18, 2009

Relax, Relate, Release!

Happy Monday!

I'm fighting this cold but it's fighting me back! I just need to take it easy. The next 3 days are gonna be hectic for me work-wise. No one does my job while I'm out, so that means I'm gonna be stressed til I get on the plane Thursday morning. All of this stress is probably how I got sick in the first place - well, that and taking kisses from a snotty nosed nephew. I feel like I've been busy for 6 months straight with no end in sight. If it wasn't for the fact that I won't get a signal in DR, I'd probably be browsing my blackberry while I sit by the pool. Crazy right!?

It's a shame that we have to force ourselves to de-stress and take a break. I wish this was something that came naturally to me, but it doesn't. I had to really talk myself into taking a vacation - well, Pretty Ricky helped convince me too! I push myself til there's nothing left; my resistance is down, defenses immune to colds and I keep going anyway for fear that someone will say I let something fall through the cracks. I wish I had the mindset that the work will be there tomorrow and that I can't do EVERYTHING. Easier said than done, especially when I'm pretty much a one woman show.

Oddly enough, people who have higher titles and make WAY more money than I do don't seem to stress as much. Why is that? Sometimes I wonder if all this stress is self-imposed or if I really do have that much responsibility. I don't really have the luxury of not taking a call or responding to an email. If something gets left undone or I make a mistake, I can't hide from it or blame someone else. I guess that's why I stay late and take my work home with me. I wish I could say it was a time management problem, but there never seem to be enough hours in the day - mainly because TV never goes off and I have no one to delegate to. I'm sure I could be doing something better, but what??

This is my challenge. While I'm sitting on a nice, warm beach sipping on fruity drinks, I'm going to re-connect with myself and relax, relate and release! I'm going to re-evaluate what it is I'm doing right and what I'm doing wrong with regard to managing my time and my stress better. I want to come back re-dedicated and re-focused so that I won't be burnt out until my next vacation. And I'm going to make sure I take MORE vacations! I'm going save time for myself and realize that I don't have to be Superwoman ALL THE TIME! The world will still turn without me....won't it? ;)

Does anyone else feel that way? I know my friends who are wives and mothers are laughing at me right now with all the work and stress that they face on a daily basis. I'm sure my workload doesn't even compare, but stress is stress - no matter what causes it. What do you all do to de-stress and relax?

We all say we want love, peace and happiness - but what are we doing to get it? That's something for me to think about as I bask in a tropical paradise while God pours a sunset across my shoulders. Ahhh...can't wait!

u Want 2 live
2 busy 2 breathe
u Want 2 give
2 busy 2 receive
u Want 2 have faith
2 busy 2 believe
u Want nothing but the truth
2 busy 2 be deceived
u Want 2 feel no pain
2 busy 2 be relieved
u Want 2 found
2 busy 2 hide
u Want sunny skies
2 busy 2 let the storm subside
u Want attention
2 busy 2 be ignored
u Want a brighter future
2 busy 2 holding on to the past
u Want it 2 never end
2 busy 2 make it last
u Want 2 be remembered
2 busy 2 be missed
u Want 2 have a long life
2 busy 2 live what’s left
u Want 2 cause me no problems
2 busy 2 be my only solution
u Want 2 smile more often
2 busy 2 be amused
u Want 2 be optimistic
2 busy 2 enjoy the simple pleasures
u Want the hurt 2 go away
Are u
2 busy 2 be loved?



Serena W. said...


Serena W. said...

Now to make a comment lol! (Annamaria don't hurt me girl)!

Brooke I used to be all about work, not taking time for me until I got seriously burnt out in 2000. So what did I do. Went far away to reconnect with myself, God and my ancestors who laid down the path for me to even work and be free. I went to Africa. That trip by far was life changing and I vowed to go away more often, reconnect with not just myself but higher power (well we should connect with God all the time) but we don't :(

Then I fell off the vacation band wagon again until I got laid off 3 times in a year (2002-2003), but yet the higher ups were still in place with their cushy a** jobs. So again I peeled back and vacationed. Even if it was just 2.5 hours away to Virginia Beach.

You have to take time for you because no one else at work will tell you (GO)! I'm proud of you Brooke to taking the leap called vacation!

I was excited when I got off the plane in Nicaragua and my Blackberry read no signal! Then my girls Internet was acting funny. I loved it! Peace and quiet to catch up with myself, loved ones and focus on my dreams and passions.

Have fun, you deserve it!

Rameer said...

Man, listen...

I try to let nothing stress me that ain't family or friend-related. And those things don't TEND to stress me, but when things pop up, I deem those travails WORTHY of me stressing. But work? Man, listen - if they throw me out the door tomorrow, my company will continue to make millions. People will continue to work. Life will not cease. Why let that place effect my mental, physical or emotional health? PLEASE.

I will deliberately sit at my desk doing NADA just to chill. When people run over to me like the sky is falling, I calmly tell them to chill and explain the problem, or I'm putting my headphones on and not concerning myself with it. People get all amped up about things - I get amped up that my baby sis is a few months from a Master's. Perspective, people.

Nothing is that important. I do my job to the best of my abilities, but I ain't killing myself or sacrificing anything. They don't pay me enough, cuz my well-being is priceless. I probably should take more vacations myself, but I don't feel the need to - I take vacation days AT WORK, if you know what I mean. Sometimes, I'll get all projects and things done way early...and just have a day at work to chill and relax.

Like today.

Like you said, Ms. Brookes - the managers ain't stressin'! Why should you kill yourself? It's all a part of how many are tricked in the Matrix of thinking this is the way things are and have to be. It's NOT. We all need to think outside of the box more, and do what is best for us. We can get our jobs done efficiently without killing ourselves or loading ourselves up.

I've NEVER taken work home with me. EVER. Whatever I don't get done on the clock will get done the next day ON THE CLOCK. You ain't payin' me to waste my personal time on your crap - I don't get any bonus for that! Nope - at 6pm EST, the kid is done. AND, I'm taking my full 1 hour lunch - I don't care WHAT you need done. You don't like it? KICK ROCKS.

And while it may seem like I would be a problem employee, I guarantee if you came to my job and asked, most people love me in the work capacity. My job is always done well and to exact specifications. But people know to follow the proper procedure in how to deal with me...and know they'll have to go to someone else to push/stress/put pressure on.

Me? Tow the line. I took red pills...not blue ones.

Brooke said...

Thanks Serena! I know I deserve it, just have to convince myself of that every now and again.

Rameer, not like you yet..but I'll get there :)

I guess sometimes I don't realize that I'm stressing myself because I actually love my job. I've been managing time well for the most part, it just happens to be a very busy season for us and now I'm trying to cram 5 days worth of work into 3, and my days are long enough when I DO have a full work week to work with.

But it's not just work - I push myself for my family and friends - and while I love them, I need to relax a bit when it comes to them too. They hopefully know I love them - but I can't keep getting sick because I don't know how to slow down.

I'll work it out :)

Serena W. said...

Girl let me tell you. When I lived in the DC area originally I was the one mainly tearing up and down 95 North and South. This go round...things will be different. Last I checked the roads go both ways such as the airways and everything else. Once I instilled that attitude (and cost of gas) those who truly love me saw that I was working like a slave when they wouldn't come to see me.

And then I love my space at the same time so I don't want visitors every single weekend. It took me to move to Dallas to realize how much I was doing, my poor old truck when I got hear conked out on me because of the ripping and running up and down the highway.

So sometimes you learn the hard way and in this case it was expensive (had to get a new whip...sigh).

I've also lost friends (weren't true friends to begin with) because it's not a one way in any case even our relationship.

So woooooooosah girlfriend, hit the beach and drink for us!

Brooke said...

You know I will!

My mind is already there...which is kinda making it hard to concentrate!

Gonna try to pack tonight - woo hoo!

Serena W. said...

Yeah it's hard when you're mentally checked out :) but pack and you'll begin to feel relaxed and excited.

Tanya said...

It is funny that you would write about I just returned to work from a staycation. It wasn't in my budget to get away...but it was good to take a break.

I have had to learn that other people's emergency is not always mine. I work in a place where we are CONSTANTLY dealing with crises. The youth & families I work with don't usually make the best decisions and I have to help them put the pieces back together. I have had to learn to take a deep breath and let things fall where they fall...because I don't have the ability or the mental capacity to take care of every last thing. I know if I don't take good care of myself...and I fall apart...they will replace me with someone else...they may be better, worse or not care as much as I I have to take a step back or a deep breath before I jump in.

Just before my staycation...I had a real bad day...I usually deal with incompetence and people who are not caring but this specific all piled up...and I almost front of my boss...I had to excuse myself and remind myself...I can't control everything or everyone around me. I keep working hard...and hope that my work will reap benefits at some point.

So please take the time to enjoy yourself...self care is ESSENTIAL!!! Have fun at the beach, let the ocean renew your spirit and know that you have all that you need to tackle every situation that is presented to is how you respond to it that will be most important!!!

Much Luv!!

Georgia Peach said...

Wow - I'm surprised the comments weren't off the hook today. Brooke - first of all I KNOW how hard you work there and I would say to you - even if times are hard you should FIGHT for them to train or hire someone as your assistant/back-up.

Back to the real topic at hand - it wasn't until very recently - a couple of years ago that I decided that my life was more important that the time I was dedicating to my job. I really made a conscious decision to focus on taking care of myself (mentally, physically - although not as much as I could and spiritually). It's something that you HAVE to do for yourself and sometimes that means taking proper time off. It's all about making your priorities work for you...The fact that you realize it's an issue is half the battle. Now you just have to change your habits and fight for you! No one else will do it for you... believe me I've been there where you are and I don't regret any of the chances or decisions I've made for ME.

have a great vacation...don't check the email, just get back to yourself.

Brooke said...

Thank you Tanya and Glee for the encouraging words and sharing stories. Like you said, realizing that I have to take steps to relax is half the battle, and I'm going to win!!!

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