Tuesday, January 18, 2011

I Kissed A Girl....

I didn’t really kiss a girl, but I knew that would pique your interest :-)

My blog topic today was inspired in part by my addiction to Witches Brew, and listening to the radio this AM. The morning talent on Power 105 was discussing the girl kiss shared by Amber Rose and Rosa Acosta. In case you missed it, here it is. Fellas, you can thank me later :-)

Now, according to Amber, she’s in love with Whiz Khalifa (whoever that is…I must NOT be in the know)…so what’s up with this kiss?

Maybe that was just a “this is my homegirl and we’re both pretty” kiss. That can happen right? Although I’ve never kissed any of MY girlfriends that way, I suppose one could view this as an innocent smooch.

But men seem to think it’s hot :-)

Amber Rose is admittedly bisexual, so she’s free to kiss anyone - regardless of gender. But word on the street is “girls kissing girls” is a new hetero trend – mainly done to attract men.

A new trend? Girls kissing girls? Nooo waaaay! Really???

It seems this has been happening since MY college days, so it’s not really THAT new. I guess we just haven’t seen it as much as we see it now. I mean, back in MY day (I feel old saying that), most women simply "danced suggestively” together in order to get a guy’s attention. You were performing for the pleasure of an audience – but boys still ruled and they loved you for it.

Now it seems that dirty dancing has been replaced by the sexy smack - some girl on girl action.

It could be that this is a safe way for some “real” lesbians to slowly explore their sexuality in public. Some say it’s copycat behavior by heterosexual women who were in a drunken state when they kissed a girl, or who want to “see what it’s like.”

Then some say it’s because women are attention whores period. They kiss girls because of a dare, or for free beer. This is happening a lot more with high school and college aged women who simply want to be the star of the show – and kissing another woman is a sure way to get a look…or three.

While most surveys say that women who kiss other women claim to be heterosexual, they admit that female bisexuality is an “exotic new trend.” They do it to let men know that they’re “sexually open and adventurous.” One male deejay this morning said that seeing a woman kiss another woman is a turn on to him, because it says to him that she is open-minded and sexually free. The other male deejay disagreed, saying that women who do this only want attention, and that he wouldn’t be cool if he came home and caught his woman making out with another woman. In his mind, if you’re with him, you’re with HIM – no women allowed in the bedroom. The other guy called him gay...in jest...I think :-)

So…if you’re Whiz Khalifa – are you turned on, or are you like “what da hell?”

Something tells me that he wouldn’t mind seeing his girl kiss Rosa Acosta, either because he thinks it’s sexy – or he knows it was a stunt. But how would you feel? Would any of you date someone who was bisexual so that you could spice up your love life with a possible threesome?

Personally, I have no desire to kiss any of my hot female friends. I guess you can say I’m not that “heteroflexible.” But according to most studies, the majority of women who kiss other women don’t do it because they want to, they do it to appeal to men – which is genius and sad at the same time. If you’ve developed your sexuality alongside internet porn, then girl on girl action may seem like the norm to you, and your sexual cues come from what you see on screen. Couple that with same-sex kissing being glamorized by celebrities like Madonna and Britney Spears and you have full-on rampant, cultural and sexual confusion.

But is it confusion if you know exactly what you’re doing? I find that most men are horny bastards all on their own – they don’t need to see a woman kissing another woman in order to get hard as Chinese arithmetic. But if a woman wants to stand out in a crowd of hot chicks, and kissing other women increases her chances – does it show how confident a woman is in exploring another area of sexuality, or does it show a deep-seeded insecurity with her sad need for attention or belief that she can’t get a man’s attention on her own merit?

What say you?




BatMan said...

First Bitches!

Domina*tricks said...

Damn, I was hoping to be first on this one since it DEFINITELY piqued MY interest! LOL!

The Cable Guy said...

I was about to be excited for a second! LOL!

While I think that video was hot, I DO think it's sad that women do this just to get attention. It shows nothing but desperation on a woman's part, and that's no sexy. It's one thing to catch two hot women who are genuinely into each other, and another to watch two women making out just to get attention. That's wack.

Stef said...

Great blog topic today!

Women who do this who are heterosexual are simply sad to me. If you're bisexual (and the jury is still out on if that's really possible from last week's blog...but whatever), then so be it, but if you claim to be hetero and are doing it to attract me, then you're wack, period. If you can't get a guy's attention on your own, then you need to step your game up.

Rameer The Circumstance said...

It HAS been going on since we were in college, Brooke-Ra. You know why you never noticed it?

Cuz it was something that happened routinely in mostly WHITE circles. I used to see white chicks do some of the CRAZIEST ISH when I was a RSA at 'Cuse. Stuff women of color never even CONSIDERED back then.

Nowadays, young girls of all hues will do this. And it's not so much exploration or experimentation as it is that being "the acceptable thing to do" when you're partying, and following the crowd. People like Amber, Nicki Garbaj and a host of other celebs have made this a "non-issue" - it's what girls DO let them tell it. "Who HASN'T kissed a girl??" I once had a high school girl I was mentoring say amongst the group.

And yes, the impetus for most of this is MEN. Tom impress and get attention from men and the crowd in general. I'm not going to go deep into how f'd up it is that our young women do anything for male attention nowadays, cuz honestly, I think young men AND women of today are bigger followers than our generation was. But it is what it is...heterosexual women kissing other hetero women is considered tame amongst things nowadays. Believe me - you talk to some of my girls, and this doesn't raise an eyebrow compared to the stories they tell of what kids in their schools do or are willing to do...

(Sorry I haven't been on here much - my new gig is keeping me busy A LOT).

Brooke said...

Congrats on the new job Rameer, I figured that's why you haven't been around :-)

I do find it sad that really young girls are doing this. They're basing their worth on what men find sexually pleasing - whether it be kissing other girls, giving bj's (cuz that's not "real" sex) or any other behavior that degrades them simply to get attention. Grown women doing this is just stupid, but young impressionable girls need to be shown better examples of how to behave if your sole motive is to attract men.

Domina*tricks said...

As for the topic, I DO think it's pathetic when hetero women do this to get attention from men. If you want to explore or experiment, then that's great! But if you do it because you feel you can't get attention from men any other way, then you have self esteem issues.

I know that isn't the answer some of you might have expected from a bisexual woman, but you have to do what feels right for YOU, not to get the attention of any sex. Being confident in who you are is powerful enough, you don't need to put on a show for someone else if it means making you feel uncomfortable or doing something you wouldn't normally do. Be who you are and that is sexy enough. Don't play yourself for a man OR a woman.

SarKism said...

all that comes to mind for me is

low self esteem
fear of not being loved by a man
absence of a father(male love at young age)
hyper-sexualized society.

i cant even frame this into a coherent paragraph and I blame the kids being home from school today ...pray for me!

Jay said...

Low self esteem and/or desperation isn't sexy on ANY one, so women kissing women just to get attention is a turn off or me.

I didn't think that video was hot at all. It was pathetic. It seemed forced, or rehearsed. Rosa Acosta looked a bit uncomfortable in my opinion, so the stunt just made them look silly. I guess I'm one of a few men who doesn't think this is sexy, or who has NO desire to have a threesome.

Some women, especially young girls, need to respect themselves a little more. Doing this crap to appeal to men is ridiculous and sad. I can see celebrities doing what they do for "reality tv" or to stay relevant, but when young girls see this and emulate it, they grow up to be confused, low esteem women who don't know how to value and VALIDATE themselves because they're looking for men to do that for them.

Jay said...

oh, and congrats on the new gig Rameer. Was wondering what was up. And I agree with your sentiments wholeheartedly.

Stef said...

Oh, and to answer your question B, NO I would not date a bisexual man. Whether they really CAN be or not, I can't get down with a man who has had sex with another man or who is attracted to men, and I have zero desire to have a threesome with 2 men...OR 2 women.

Rameer The Circumstance said...

Thanks for the congrats, guys - appreciate it!

We all seem to be on the same page on today's subject...

Mr. Nice Guy said...

If dating a bisexual chick increases my chances of having a threesome, then I'm all for it! However, hetero women who engage in bi/lesbian behavior just to get attention are sad souls indeed.

Women don't have to do that to show that they're sexually free or open minded. Confident and secure women are sexy, not desperate attention seeking sluts.

Stef said...

Congrats on the new job Rameer - are you still working in tv?

Annamaria said...

Congrats Rameer & Rosa's shoes are FIRE...LOL

OK sorry back to the topic... If you're on your ISH.. you don't need to do anything for attention or to get noticed. If you do.. that is SAD.

Now if you're the type to sometimes feel like a nut & sometimes you don't...then that's your own business. LOL

But I do agree... Rosa looked VERY uncomfy & like she wanted to just say please stop kissing me. LOL

Jaz said...

I'm late, but this was uncomfortable to watch. Not because it was bisexual/lesbian behavior, but because it didn't look real. This looked staged, like they discussed it before they left the restaurant. This was all done for publicity, and i know Amber has a new reality show coming out, so I'm sure this was part of it.

Now, I don't want to be a hypocrite, so I will say that I kissed a woman once back in high school. A guy said he would give me and my best friend $50 each if we kissed for 10 seconds, so we did it. It was spur of the moment, we were thinking about the money and we were 15 at the time. And he DID pay us! Back then, $50 was a LOT for a high school kid, and since we both knew we were straight and were best friends, it was no big deal to us. Looking back on it, it was immature and silly to do for money, but it was the easiest $50 I've ever made :) I would rather do it for money than a guy, but in the end, either way it was for the wrong reason and I would never do that now as an adult.

The Cable Guy said...


Did you slip her the tongue? :) LOL!

Anonymous said...

I might do it now as an adult for $50! LOL!

Stef said...

Why do men like seeing lesbians or bisexual women making out? I never understood that. Is it because they want to join in?

Jaz said...

@Cable Guy,

No, I didn't slip her the tongue. It was a closed mouth kiss.

The Cable Guy said...


It just looks sexy I guess. Maybe we hope to join in, but women are so pretty and so soft, it just looks nice.

Two grenades can't be doing it though, then it just looks nasty.



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