Monday, April 27, 2009

Happy Monday!

I don't think we could have asked for a more perfect weekend weather-wise. Gorgeous wasn't it? Saturday night was a great night for a bachelorette party!

Now, for those of you who are on Facebook, you may have noticed my status update. It said something along the lines of Renee's bachelorette party and my baby daddy...who knows, I can't really remember ;-) This is for you Maliek!

(I think one of them actually DID dance to this song :-) LOL)

Ahem, anyway, we had a blast! We went to a "Hunk-a-Mania" show at club Element in NYC, and the blushing bride-to-be had a lot to blush about. She got a lot of special attention from some of the hottest men I've seen...including "Captain Tyson" as he was so affectionately known (we'd make some beautiful babies).

While I wouldn't REALLY procreate with stripper man, they were all easy on the eyes. But that's about it...just the eyes. Most shows like that don't get down and dirty and you don't see everything. They may tease you, do a few tricks, gyrate in your face - you know, the usual. But nothing really crazy ever happens. Women are screaming and yelling, not really at the men...but at what the men are doing to whoever the honoree is. Bachelorette parties are for embarrassing the bride, not about trying to get busy with the stripper. Most women barely want to touch the strippers because they're all sweaty. They might let you slap their ass...and women mostly touch them to stick a few singles in the thong thingy they're wearing.

All innocent.

Bachelor parties though? I've heard it's a very different story. However, I have YET to find a man who will go into ANY type of detail about what REALLY goes on. They'd never provide colorful commentary, no matter how tame or untame it may have been. Men have a code - what happens at the bachelor party STAYS at the bachelor party. A new world will be built before you find out what goes on least from guy's perspective anyway. I used to wonder if it's really as bad as we think it is.

Well, a girlfriend of mine is a bartender - both in clubs and for private events. The stories she has told me about what goes on there is just straight up nasty. She said she's seen it all - from orgies, to men getting blowjobs in the middle of the room, having sex in random rooms of a hotel suite - you name it, she's seen it. She said she was actually quite horrified to see some of the men doing these crazy things - most of them with wedding rings on their fingers - using NO PROTECTION whatsoever with women who could care less so long as they were making money. Now, I always viewed bachelor parties as an excuse for the guests to act a fool, not really the groom. The Best Man feels the pressure to provide a kick-ass party, complete with strippers, even if the groom says he doesn't want any. It's not really for him, it's for THEM. My friend's stories have pretty much confirmed that. While she says that she's seen the groom get special attention in private rooms, the parties were mostly for his boys. She said it made her glad she was single, because nothing respectful was going on.

Now, I'm not saying a bachelorette party can NEVER reach that level...but I have yet to hear of one or attend a party like that. For women, bachelorette parties aren't about a "last night of sexual freedom" - meaning possible sex with someone else before she ties the knot. I'm not saying all men view bachelor parties that way either, but sometimes it makes you men feel that they HAVE to have a bachelor party for that reason? One last night of freedom?

I'll pose the question to both men and women:

1. Do you want - or feel that you HAVE to - have a bachelor/bachelorette party?
2. If you're married - did you have one? Was it tame, or ig'nant off da hook?
3. If you weren't having a bachelor/bachelorette party and your spouse-to-be wanted one, would you allow him/her to have one?
4. What would you do if you found out they had one against your wishes?
5. Have you ever been to a party where someone (or yourself) did something they weren't supposed to do at the party with a stripper? If so, would you ever tell?

Let's hear what y'all have to say about this one? Enjoy the weather today - another beauty!



Pretty Ricky What Dey Call'em said...

First.... Bitches????

Pretty Ricky What Dey Call'em said...

HAAAA HAAAAA... I AM FIRST BITCHES. In any regards, I've seen it all at Batchelor parties, and I can not understand why in the hell with anyone want to actually have sex with a nasty ass stripper who does this every weekend. She probably just cane from one.

Personally... I want a Batchelor party, but I just want it to be a big party with my boys... and some of my best girlfriends... we all get drunk, dance, party...and at best... one of my guy friend and girl friends hook up. Boing Chicka Wow Wow.

I don't understand the whole stripper, strip club scene period. But that's a whole other topic! But here's the question, is getting some from a stripper any different from a one night stand?

Brooke said...

No, it's not's just a one night stand with a stipper. Yuk!!!

I updated my status in jest, but seriously, all I think about is disease when I think of female strippers and gay when I think of male strippers. While I was impressed with dude's tricks, wasn't really trying to take his ass home :)

Although I'm sure Maliek and Rameer think differently :-)

Rameer said...

I'm getting over you cheatin' on me, Ms. Brookes - the best way I can...


As far as bachelor parties go, the game is to be sold, not told. My boys already get on me for droppin' dime on many facets of The Manhood...I ain't talkin' about anything I know or have seen definitively...snitches get stitches!

Would I like a bachelor party? Yup. Most of the ones I've been to are a lot of fun, whether they be tame or crazy. It's about the guys throwing a party, and there ain't nothing wrong with that. Doesn't mean a stripper HAS to be there...although, I'm close to Canada. And if you don't know...well, you don't know.

If it was that big of an issue, I'd let my wife-to-be either in on it or plant someone she felt like she could trust. But she SHOULD trust me...everyone who knows me I tend to never lie.

Let's not assume all strippers are nasty hoes, too! I know some upstanding, dancers - who are very good at their craft!!!

Serena W. said...

Hey everyone! Chilling in Miami enjoying this weather! Whew! As for wanting a bacherlorette party I'm with Pretty Ricky, I want to invite peeps over, men and women and we have a good time! Get tipsy, drunk, folks who been eye balling each other and you single then hey get jiggy with it!

I personally don't like strippers and stuff. Went on a ski trip and let's say those dudes who stripped ended up in the hoochie mamas rooms down the hall! I think one of the chicks was married! Wow!

If he wants to then do you, at that point of the game I will trust him enough to have a crazy bachelor party cause the real pole will be in our bedroom anyway when he comes home! Ah shucks watch out now!

Brooke said...

Yeah, I think I'd have no problem with my man having a bachelor party, but I'd prefer they not be in the house with strippers over. If you want to go out and see them, your thing. Something about in-house hoes is upsetting to me. But then again, like you said...if I trust him enough to marry him, I should trust him not to disrespect me. Let his boys have their fun.

Do you think men give in to the pressure of allowing something to happen cuz their boys expect it?

Rameer said...

I can't answer that. Everyone is an individual. All I know is me and my crew have always been the anti-peer pressure boys - we do what WE want to, regardless if everyone thinks different.

At some point, you just realize you're a man and you're gonna do you.

Serena W. said...

Oh yeah the party needs to be outside the house! Go to Vegas, Miami for all I care.

Not sure if the men give into pressure. Can one of our fellas answer that one.

Anthony Otero said...

I have have been two a few batchelor parties and I will say that if i did have one it will be nothing compared to what I had witnessed in the parties I have seen prior.

Serena W. said...

Me and Rameer were answering at the same time lol!

Brooke said...

Okay Ant, you say that...but what if one of your boys planned the party for you and there were nasty ass strippers everywhere doing unthinkable things - would you leave or just roll with it since your boy planned it for you?

or are you saying none of your boys would plan something like that for you?

Anonymous said...

If you love your wife and are in love with your wife to be...the last thing you wanna do is have sex with some miscellaneous piece of ass..stripper. that's an the movie brown sugar.....Zay

Brooke said...

Well, in Brown Sugar, she was his friend, not an ex. That was the first time he had sex with her.

But in a situation like that, do you admit to your fiancee what you did, or take it to your grave like he did?

What would you do if you found out years later that your spouse - with whom you've been in wedded bliss with since you got married - had sex with someone right before your wedding?

Georgia Peach said...

Wow today is quiet up in here. Guess no one wants to spill the beans.

1) I wouldn't mind one, but personally I find male strippers rather nasty. LOL...just not my cup of tea.

2) n/a

3) I'd allow it, but probably wouldn't like it if he went into it with ill intentions (aka to get one last piece of a$$ before we got married.) If it's just to blow off some steam and have a lil fun I have no problems with it.


5)Nope and even if they did it's not my place to tell.

Brooke said...

Okay Glee, devil's advocate.

What if your fiance had a bachelor party, and let's say E. was there and witness some crazy goings on between your man and a stripper. He goes home and tells Nadja what went you expect Nadja to tell you - or is it not her place?

Anonymous said...

B..He didn't hit it though .....he just messed around a lil bit...and there is no need to speak on that, that's minor...or is it? what you think b.. Having sex b4 the wedding is nasty on both sides....because the next day your suppose to have sex with your mate.

Brooke said...

Oh right, they kissed, and then they had sex after he weas married and while SHE was engaged..I remember now...

Would you want to know if your wife had messed around with someone the night before you both got married? And you didn't answer the question - what if you found out years later that they did something - anything - right before you got married, but have been happily married ever since?

Georgia Peach said...

I've had something very similar happen (not at a strip club), but i still believe it's not her place, my place to share. What's between her and her man is between her and her man. I'm not about to get all up in that... I'll tell you the story sometime offline.

Anthony Otero said...

To answer your questions...

I do not put it past certain people to plan something like that for me.

If they did. I would, of course, roll with it. I can't say no to watching Titties (and more) for free!

Brooke said...

Now see...Ant...trouble!

what if you and your wife had an agreement? You still roll with it, even if you knew your wife wouldn't like it? or do you not tell her?

Anthony Otero said...

Let's be clear. I am only talking about looking at strippers and the tricks they do, possibly a lap dance at the most. I do not see a big deal with this.

I would never marry a woman who cannot handle me going to a strip club or getting a lap dance.

So the only deal would be to have fun and dont be stupid.

Anonymous said...

True true.maybe that's not a good example or maybe it is an example of "when keeping it real the night b4 your wedding goes bad" but anywhooo...i dont know how i would deal with a situation like that. i guess it depends on whether you are still with the person and if you still love them. If your happily married i think it might be easier to forgive. but who knows.

Brooke said...

We'll discuss that in my blog tomorrow ;-)

But Ant, the reason I ask is because the bride-to-be from this past weekend had an agreement with her fiance that he could go LOOK at strippers OUTSIDE the house - no in-house stippers. They live in MD. She was in NYC this past weekend for her party. He had his in MD, but the kicker is his best man brought strippers IN-HOUSE. So he broke the agreement, even though technically HE didn't do it, his BOY did. So in this case, do you skip the party or roll with it knowing you inadvertently broke the agreement?

Anthony Otero said...

First, you avoid this whole situation by telling your boys not bring that shit in the house. Those types of parties taking me I know.

Your boy is not going to fuck shit up for you by breaking that one rule. So I dont think he told his boys. There just needs to be some communication on amgonst friends on what to do

and well...if my boy did show up and I did not know about it and I told him...well, i guess someone is gonna be

Brooke said...

you ain't right :-)

Unknown said...

Yet another sexists feminist article about how Men are so much worse than women.. no no no all Bachelorette parties are SO innocent.. yea.. Im sure.. theyre all mother thersas and the Men are all dirty cheaters...

What a load of sexist BS

Stef said...


the author told about bachelorette parties from her point of view, but she clearly said that she's not saying bachelorette parties have NEVER reached that level. Get a grip, it wasn't sexist, and she asked the questions of BOTH sexes. You obviously read what you WANTED to read...get over it.

Anonymous said...

From what I've heard, read, saw, and experienced, it seems that most bachelor parties are wilder than most bachelorette parties. A lot of women don't even do the stripper thing. They go to spas and such. A lot of guys doing skiing or paintball these days, but there are still traditional parties and that's what we're discussing.

I can tell you straight out there's one guy who doesn't want to be at the party and he's the bachelor. A friend of mine and his wife who I both grew up with had stripper parties. The day after their party, the girls told us what they did. They went to a strip club where the guys would strip to thongs. The bride drank a ton, not by choice, and the other girls egged her on. They even told us there favorite stripper was Jay Steele. There was no touching.

Then the girls asked us what happened. We said nothing. Then one of the guys asked if anyone had cream for his coffee and all the guys burst out laughing. That may the girls nervous. One of the differences was that his was a house party and she had hers at a club. Clubs will always be tamer because they don't want to get shut down, but watch for the bars with the rental areas. You might think it's a club, but it could be a bar with rooms they rent out for parties. A bachelor party will have coverings over the windows.

I was at a restaurant one time where they were also hosting a bachelorette party in the next room. It was so tame that they didn't even bother covering the windows. The girls at our table didn't even bother sneaking a peek.

benilhalk said...

Planning my cousin’s bachelorette party at one of Venues in San Francisco and going to organize an enjoyable party for her at one of Venues in San Francisco. Well, need to have few elegant ideas for the day. Please help!

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