Friday, July 31, 2009

TGIF!!!

Okay...so it’s Friday, I’m busy as hell at work, and I want to keep it light and fun today.

Instead of straining my brain to come up with something clever to write, I figured I’d see where all of YOUR heads are today. So I’ve come up with a few questions to ask to see what the consensus was on some things I have certain opinions on. I want to see if you all think the same way I do, so I’m leaving my answers off…for now.

Since I don’t want to leave anyone out, I’ve come up with a list of questions for both men and women to answer. But if there’s a question you’d like answered by the opposite sex, feel free to ask it!

Women:

1. What are your thoughts on the “Bro-zilian?” You know…men who shave “down there.” Like it? Love it? Hate it? Don’t care?

2. How often do you fake (if ever) an orgasm?

3. Do you keep your own stash of condoms in the crib, or do you make him bring his own every time?

4. Would you rather have a man who was 2 inches shorter than you with a 10 inch penis, or a man who was over 6 feet tall with a 5 inch penis?

5. If you could have sex with any man in the world you wanted - and he’d be down for it - but ONLY if you got a permission slip from your significant other, would you ask for it?

6. What kind of bachelorette party would you like to have – 1) Bonding with the girls with a spa day and then dinner 2) A night out on the town drinking and club hopping 3) Strip joint? If you’re already married…what kind, if any, did you have?

7. Do you have a porn stash and a drawer full of toys?

8. If it were completely safe and painless (and free), would you get breast implants, lipo or any other cosmetic surgery?

9. Which would you respect more – a man who doesn’t work, but is a great stay at home father and is a wonderful husband, or a man who was successful at his career and made well over 6 figures, took care of you and the kids financially, but was always working and never helped you around the house or with the kids?

10. Do you think a man can be bisexual? And if he told you he was, would you date him?


Men:

1. Do you prefer a woman who is waxed, shaved, bare down there? Brazilian? Topiary? Chia Pet?

2. Have you ever had sex with a woman you ACTIVELY disliked?

3. Have you ever measured your penis? Come on now…tell the truth. Extra points if you tell us how long it is ;-)

4. Have you ever faked an orgasm? (and if so, how did you manage to get away with that?)

5. Same question – if you could have sex with any woman in the world you wanted ONLY if you got written permission from your significant other, would you ask for it?

6. If your friends threw you a bachelor party, which would you prefer? 1) A night at a casino or sporting event, followed by bar hopping (no topless bars) 2) A boys bonding weekend in the woods or an island 3) A night in a strip club with lap dances. Same thing - if you’re married already, what kind of party, if any, did you have?

7. Would you rather be with a woman with a striking face and an average body, or a bangin’ body and an average face?

8. If your girlfriend/wife could be good at only one of the following, at which would you want her to be an expert? 1) Oral sex 2) Cooking 3) Sports (yeah right)

9. Which of the following would make you the most uncomfortable? Dating a woman, who, compared to you, is: 1) More sexually experienced 2) A better athlete 3) Smarter 4) More successful in her career 5) Made double your salary

10. Would you be more interested, less interested, or not care if a woman you were interested in dating told you she was bisexual?

Go!

-b

37 comments:

DMoe said...

first! bitches!

Anthony Otero said...

i am so mad...

Brooke said...

aww damn! so close!

The Cable Guy said...

F*CK!!!!

I go take a piss for 2 seconds and y'all n*&*as beat me! I've been waitin on this sh&t all day!

DAMMIT!!!

Anthony Otero said...

Here are my answers...dont hate because I am comfotable with who i am...lol

1. I do not have a preference on shaved or unshaved...however i noticed that shaved and brazilian make oral sex more enjoyable.

2. I have never has sex with a woman i disliked.

3. Yes I have measured mine. I have women measure mine. 8 inches.

4. Yes I have faked it. This chick was so wide open and I couldnt feel anything..so after she came I pretended to bust in the condom..not that hard to do..lol

5. Salma Hyek - good lord...lol

6. A night in a strip club with lap dances..anything less is just hanging out.

7. This is hard question...but back has to have a body...lol

8. Cooking...everything else I can work with.

9. None of these make me uncomfortable...but if I had to choose I would say better athlete

10. I might be more intersted if she was bi...lol

5.

DMoe said...

And now that the "amazing race" portion of the blog's out the way...

Great line of questions Brookey. Here are my responses:

1. I prefer a woman who is waxed, shaved, Brazilian and whatever other words describe a perfect asphalt road for my car to drive on in that metro area.

2. No. Can't get past that.

3. No, I haven't, but someons has done it on my behalf.

4. Yes. LOL. And its not that difficult. For me to divulge more of the part where I even get to a point to have to fake one - THAT'S the real story. LOL.

5. No. Sexual euphoria lasts for a while, but the mental damage is killer. It ain't that serious, but the situation is under review.

6. The party would be a combination of all three you listed. Having been there, mine had its moments, but the one I threw for my good friend was a flawless, well-oiled machine(no pun intended). I could run down how it "went down" but that's a blog within itself. However, it is classic folklore.

7. Striking faces and average bodies can be molded like clay as time marches on. An average face we are stuck with, and that bangin' body to start with is always 2 glazed donuts away from the proverbial "fall off".
The first is about achievement, the second is about scheduled maintenance.

8. I'd have to say "cooking". Oral sex experts come with years of experience (which brings all sorts of OTHER considerations). Plus, oral sex experts dont make the best decisions. Hence, their status upgraded to "expert" in that department. An expert cook will constantly evolve, and adjust with new flavors and dishes. Her oral sex skills can be tuned to my likes, and if she's worth her salt, she'll apply the same (gulp) "thirst" for knowledge in areas other than the kitchen.

9. Most uncomfortable? Definitely the sexual experience. If we're talking any term longer than the casual encounter. Again, if you bring YEARS of experience in certain areas, your foolishness possibilities are damn near limitless. I just don't have the time for the archaelogical dig through the idiosyncracies that come along with such.

10. Dating me and your bisexual? Well, speaking selfishly cuz I'm a team player, score a chick we can BOTH enjoy. Then, you've really shown me something. Otherwise, it suits no purpose. LOL.

That's it for now...I'll enjoy my spot from THE FRONT ROW!

Dmoe aka Firston Howell III

-V- said...

1. I prefer a little hair but bare is just fine. No 70's porn bush please.

2. Disliked, no. Not really attracted to, yes.

3. Yes, way back in high school. I'm the John Holmes of my people so that makes me above average ;-) Women always want to measure it though.

4. Faked it a few times. Sometimes you just want it to be over.

5. Standing permission requests for Sophie Marceau, Rosaline Sanchez & Gabrielle Reese.

6. Something cool like Alaska or Belize. Strip clubs are way overrated.

7. Face/body: tough one ... it would depend on her personality & character.

8. Oral sex. I do most of the cooking anyway.

9. None of those traits would bother me. I'm comfortable in my own skin.

10. I'd be curious - oh the possibilities!

The Cable Guy said...

1. Brazilian...landing strip, whatever you wanna call it. Doesn't have to be bare, but oral IS better that way.

2. Nope.

3. I have. Brooke, I'll tell you offline...but it's bigger than 8 ;)

4. Never faked it. Why would I? That's wack..and if she's wack, she's wack. Not faking it for NOBODY.

5. I'd have to think she was out of my league in order to ask for permission. And I can't think of anyone who is. Arrogant? maybe, but so what. I'm nice with mine.

6. Strip club and lap dances.

7. Striking face, average body.

8. Cooking. I can do her ;)

9. None of those would bother me. I'd actually PREFER that she be all of those things...means my baby is BAD!

10. Less interested. Not a fantasy of mine.

5.

Brooke said...

Where my ladies at???

-V- said...

Union, not Reese. But you knew that.

Brooke said...

Yes V, I knew you meant Union. I still have that pic where you put my face on her body on Photoshop! LOL!!Or was that Sanaa Lathan?

Yolanda said...

1. Don’t mind it at all… if I keep my bush well-pruned, so should he!
2. Never.

3. I’m well-stashed!

4. Tall guy with the 5 inch penis. I’m sorry, I can’t do short. I just can’t. (Watch, I’ll wind up married to a short man!)

5. No… I can’t divide the pie.

6. STRIPPERS!!!

7. No porn stash…one toy for me…one for him!

8. I’d soooo get some lipo or maybe a tummy tuck but I don’t have much more to lose in that region. Yaaay crack diet!

9. I’ll take Mr. Mom please!

10. Hell to the naw! I'm strictly dickly and he needs to enjoy stroking the kitty, exclusively!

Anonymous said...

1. I love a man who is well groomed. I don't like bald but trimmed is nice.
2. I am a firm believer in NEVER, EVER faking it. Just let him know, Honey, it's just not going to happen right now, but we can try again later.
3. I've always kept my own stash.A women should never depend on anyone to secure her sexual health and safety.
4.Size is not on the top of my priority list.Technique is key. I prefer width. But I did have a man with a small penis who rocked my world and blew my mind.
5. aye, yae yae,Antonio Sabatto Jr. Just thinking about him gets me excited. I've already let my honey know if it happens I'm going there. He laughs every time. Hey I can dream can't I.
6.Bonding with my girls at a spa, drinking mimosa's and some nice green on the side.
7.ah yea, my porn stash has been compromised. My favorite toy is called the Ultimate KISS.Two speeds in under 4 minutes. Ladies I tell you, you can get really hooked. I'm just happy my man isn't intimidated.
8.No implants, lipo for sure just to bring down these thunder thighs.
9.Wow, that's a hard one.maybe a man who works from home, is a great father and husband.
10.Yes a man can be bi-sexual. I have dated a bi-sexual man and found out after we dated he was Bi. He never gave me any reason to think he was bi, and he's been my best lover to date.I would not willing date a man who is Bi-sexual.my ego can't take it. You'd be surprised how many of you have dated a man who is bi, you just didn't know it.The down low scene is larger than you can ever imagine. That man who you think is so hard, so thug, can be dippin for both teams. That's why it doesn't matter if you are single or your in a Monogamous relation ship you should ALWAYS get tested for HIV.
Stephanie A.K.A barriodiva

NightFall914 said...

1. Brazil is possible...but a clean shave is fine

2. Yes...Power sex, she couldn't say shit to me afterward.

3. I've had it measured cuz she wanted proof.

4. Yes. we were late for a party.Not sure how i did but I did it.

5. No, that "permission slip" would like signing over your freedom after its all done.

6. I'll take the casino. I been around strippers for the past 8 yrs.I'm good.

7. Striking face

8. Cooking

9. Double the salary

10. That's nothing new so it wouldn't effect me much.

Brooke said...

"Power sex"...interesting....

Stephanie, you're right, you never know if he's dippin for both teams. But if he TOLD you UPFRONT, you'd still go there?

Rameer said...

I've been on vacation, so forgive the lack of input over this past week. Or, maybe you guys prefer it - who knows...

On to the questions:

1. I used to not care, but I like it now when it's shaved and/or trimmed down there now. I think it's pretty sexy.

2. I'm with Nightfall on this one - HELL YES. I BEASTF***ED her. And like he said...she couldn't say SQUADOOSH to me afterwards. Still can't...I left that body smoking.

I knew her problem with me was cuz she probably wanted me to some extent...couldn't stand her then, and can't stand her now. But she learned AT LEAST 5 new languages on that fateful night...LMAO!

3. I've honestly never measured mine. I've never been interested...what, am I gonna compare it to other dudes' schlongs? Every woman I've been with seemed to like it, so I'm good. Sorry, that's just being honest.

4. Yes, I've faked it. It's really not hard like the guys said, especially for me. I don't go through all types of histrionics and crap when I do, and I tend to not even NEED to have an orgasm most of the time to enjoy sex. When I do reach that point, most women have had a hard time telling if I came or if I just wanted to stop/slow down...

5. Well, if I had a significant other, she's all I would need, so I'd never ask the question. But if you want to know who I would be with if my significant other OFFERED that I could have an exception...great minds think alike...

Ain't NAILED IT with Salma Hayek...GEEE-ZUS KRYYYYYYST!!!

6. I'd prefer a combo of the three options listed, but if I have to choose from what's offered...give me option #1, cuz I can still involve females in my group and meet some out to party with.

7. Judging by my history...I tend to be with women with a striking face, so I'll go striking face, average body. But these women I've been with tend to have banging bodies AND faces, so I'm don't know what I really prefer...I'll stick with my answer, though.

8. This is a no-brainer. Cooking. Refer to DMoe's answer for details.

9. None would make me uncomfortable. But if I had to choose, I'd say her being a better athlete - cuz I'm ultra-competitive. But honestly - I'd find that sexy as all hell...

10. I think I'm more interested if she IS bi...that's just me. Something sexy about being able to scope out girls with your girl...I've been through it before. IT was GREAT.


By the way...I peeped Cable Guy's subliminal dig at Ant...y'all cats are like the Hatfields & McCoys...LMAO!!!

Anthony Otero said...

Rameer - A horse has a bigger dick that does mean Brooke will ride it...

Brooke said...

oh damn...

...and yuk!

Brooke said...

and I hope you meant that DOESN'T mean Brooke will ride it!

Anthony Otero said...

yes..doesnt...sorry i type fast.

The Cable Guy said...

She wouldn't ride it cuz it's a HORSE. But put that bigger dick on a fine ass Jamaican such as myself and she might go reverse cowgirl on a n*gga ;)

Brooke said...

Rameer, stop instigating!

...and "BEASTF*cked"? Why does that sound violent to me?

Brooke said...

uh...can y'all keep my name out ya mouf!? :-) LOL!!

Anthony Otero said...

Ok Mr.Ed, I think you officially endeared yourself to her..

Rameer said...

1. I ain't instigating! I KNOW Ant saw that subliminal! He ain't stupid!

2. Beastf***ing sure ain't the love scene from Jason's Lyric, that's fa sho'...

3. Damn, Ant - A HORSE?!? LMBAO!!!

Anthony Otero said...

Rameer...and you know what, I wouldnt be surprised if he was in back of the Time Warner truck with a ruler saying..."Please be bigger...Please be bigger"

Rameer said...

COT-DAMN, ANT!!

You been listening to Eminem's new dis on Mariah & Nick? Cuz you spewing hot FIYAAAAAHHHHH!!!

Anonymous said...

Brooke, No I wouldn't go there if he told me up front. The only reason I found out about my ex was 4 years later I found out through an aquaintence. I respect someones right to be Bi-sexual.My ego wouldn't be able to handle it.
Stephanie

The Cable Guy said...

B knows how I feel about her, I think she's already "endeared" to me. As for please be bigger, I'll let her tell you if I am or not.

Brooke said...

I hear you Stephanie.

I didn't answer these questions... yet, but I will say that I believe that if a man can have sex with another man, he's gay...not Bi. But that's just me :)

Brooke said...

oh, and Eminem's diss on Mariah was KA-RAZY!!! I saw that on Witches Brew and was like "DAYYUMMM!!!"

The Fury said...

1 Brazilian

2 Yes. It was pretty damn good cuz it was all hateful and shit

3. Yes I have...

4. Yes. Get away with it? Umm..just said i did and kept it moving.

5. Yes and chances are she'd give it thinking I wouldn't do it. LOL

6. All three. Casinos, lap dances on an island.

7. Striking face though I love banging bodies. I like seeing pretty faces contort when I'm giving her the good shit.

8. Cooking. She can be chef and make some money.

9. None. If I HAD to choose I'd say better athlete, but I'm not a sportsman so I really don't give a fuck. I'd be on the sidelines like "get em baby'

10. more interested...you know what it is!!

The Fury said...

Wait...just read these responses. Did The Cable Guy just throw some Brooke business out in the street? OOh ooh weee

The Cable Guy said...

Nah, nothing like that. Brooke is a good girl, and I'd never do that. One day she may find out and I'll leave it up to her to share ;)

Brooke said...

Uh...again. Can y'all leave me out of this? And Cable Guy, glad you cleared that up...and fast - cuz I was about to say...

Since I'm being pressured to share my answers (I was told it was close of business time and that my time has run out) - here are mine.

1. I like it if a man keeps it neat down there, but something about being bare as a baby's bottom creeps me out a bit...like you haven't hit puberty yet. If you have a brazilian, I'll think you're suspect.

2. I don't fake it. I feel like if I did, a man would be able to tell. I "do things" when I have an orgasm, and if I can fake it and you not know, then I think I'd be insulted cuz it would mean you're not paying attention. However, most women I talk to who have faked it say they get away with it all the time cuz the man is too busy having his ego fed to know better. And that's wack.

3. I have some for my own safety, but the box in unopened. Most men prefer to use/bring their own.

4. I'd rather the man work whatever he has, no matter his height.

5. I wouldn't ask. When I DO have a significant other, no man can touch him...I wouldn't even want it if he gave it to me.

6. Spa Day and dinner. I don't really drink and club hopping is not my thing really. I've done so many bachelorette parties with strippers that the novelty has worn off. My girls never get old tho.

7. No porn stash, and sadly no toys anymore. The toy I had broke, still trying to replace it. I've been bullsh*ttin.

8. If anything, I'd have a breast LIFT, but no need to add to the girls. They're heavy enough as it is.

9. Mr. Mom...definitely.

10. I already answered this - if a man can get hard for another man, he's gay...not Bi. Sorry if there are dudes reading this who claim to be bi...I ain't havin it.

Tony said...

Ok I had to play in this one.

Here are my answers:

1. Shaved is MUCH better if you are "going downtown."

2. I have had sex with women that I have absolutely hated! I did it because there was no one else around at the time and I was horny!

3. Yes I have measured mine. 8 inches.

4. Yes I have faked it. A buch of times....especially when very drunk with "Whiskey dick" but too tired to keep going. It's actually pretty easy to get away with if there is no condom used. It's a great way to fool the woman into thinking you are the Energizer Bunny!

5. Eva Mendez! Already asked just in case!

6. A night in a strip club with lap dances

7. Stunning Face all day! Banging bodies get flabby and then you're stuck with a ugly flabby chick .

8. Cooking...ABSOLUTEY the most important.

9. Smarter? (only because I felt like I had to choose. Actually none would really bother me.

10. No.....if it came up cool but I wouldn't care one way or the other.

Brooke said...

what the hell is "whiskey dick"? LOL!!

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