Tuesday, July 21, 2009

"Flicking the Bean"

Happy Tuesday!

First things first...Happy Birthday to our very own Rameer Green! Happy Birthday Snookums!

Today isn't TMI Tuesday, but let's pretend it is :-)

So I went to see The Ugly Truth last night starring Katherine Heigl and "300 dude" Gerard Butler. Check out the clip.



I'm a romantic comedy fan, and if you have nothing better to do this weekend, go check it out. I thought it was funny. And apparently Gerard was on point with some of his advice when it comes to women, men and relationships...or so I was told last night. Anyway, what I want to talk about is a question that was asked in the film.

Spartan guy asked her, "so...how often do you flick your bean?" I was like, "huh...what did he just say?" Flick her bean?!

I'd never heard that one before! Hilarious!

In case you haven't figured it out and you were living under a rock with me, "flicking your bean" means masturbating. After I realized what he said, I knew it would be my topic for today. Because as we all know, I've been needing to "flick my bean" for a while now ;-)

In the movie, she said she didn't do that...that it was impersonal.

Uh...hello?! What could be more personal than flicking your own bean? It's called self love :-)

His response? "If you don't want to have sex with you, who else will?"

Good answer!

Without giving too much away, keep an eye out for the vibrator panties scene. Classic! I have to get a pair of these...like NOW. Oh the things I have in mind for those...woo-wee!!

So, needless to say, I'm am VERY serious about replacing my toy, and that movie was the jump-start I needed. Studies show that the number of women who have tried or who use sex toys regularly is over 50%. That means if you ain't using one, your girl is...sorry for the visual (unless you're into that sort of thing)

I remember telling my girls that I didn't own a toy. They looked at me like I was an alien and cooed, "you poor thing!"They took me out for my birthday, complete with dinner and a visit to The Pink Pussycat. They fixed that problem stat! I was totally embarrassed as we walked in and I saw all the sexual eye candy. The clerk came over and asked us if we needed help. I let them do all the talking as they seemed like the experts. The clerk was demonstrating toys like they were vacuum cleaners or something. The questions turned to me.

"Do you like clitoral or vaginal stimulation...which makes you cum faster?"

uh...that's none of your business!!! And certainly not something I feel my girls should know about me. I was kinda disturbed at how freely THEY talked to me about their "lady space."

I finally got the nerve to answer...and their solution? The Rabbit. In purple...my favorite color :)

It sat hidden in my nightstand for MONTHS. First of all, I live alone and have no man, so I'm not sure who I was hiding it from. Maybe myself? I was afraid of it. I was intimidated by it. I thought only certain women (read: lonely or sexually deviant) used those things. Not good girls.

Until one night....

I was watching Love Jones...one of my favorite movies ever. It makes you fall in love with love. I was mad I didn't have a man to cozy up to, and the scene where they're making love to Maxwell's sexy version of "Sumthin Sumthin" always gets me hot. I decided to go to bed and let my dreams take over. Like clockwork, I was having one of my wet dreams when I was awakened by a clap of thunder and I jumped up...all sweaty. I didn't get a chance to...uh...finish.

I slowly opened the nightstand door. I thought, "Hey, it's better than calling Tyrone." I wasn't sure if the batteries it came with still worked, but I was about to find out.

In the dark, I positioned it just right, and turned it on. The red meter rose all the way to the top and BZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!

"wh..whoa....whooooaaaa!"

Man..listen....

When I tell you I felt like I was being electrocuted, that's an understatement. I shook so hard I felt like I'd caught Annamaria's taser between my legs. The sensation was SO INTENSE I almost fell off the bed. Electricity shot through my thighs, up my spine and into euphoria. In that moment, all I could think was, "what the hell TOOK ME SO LONG to try this?!" It changed my life.

This is not to say that sex with myself is better than with a partner. But my self-pleasure toy experience definitely adds another dimension to my sex life. Sex with a man you care deeply for who takes the time to explore your body is mind-blowing all by itself. But for those times when we don't have that connection with said man, BOB works just fine.

And if your man is into toys, then that's even better! Some men are intimidated by them, others say bring it on! If you're not sure how he'll react, bring it up casually over drinks or dinner by saying something like, "you know, I won this "silver bullet" at a bachelorette party...I wonder if it's really as good as they say."

If he says, "hmmm, interesting...tell me more"...then he's into it. If not and he changes the subject, he's not...and he's WACK!

So, needless to say, I have some serious shopping to do. Ladies, if you don't feel like making a trip, go online and browse - selfservetoys.com, babeland.com or smittenkittenonline.com come to mind. That way, you won't have to tell a sex clerk all your freaky secrets :-)

I never thought I'd be the type of girl to own, let alone actually USE a sex toy. Now I wanna get at least 2 of those suckas!

Now where did I put my platinum card...?? ;-)

-b

29 comments:

Annamaria said...

FIRST BITCHES!!!!!!!!!!!HAHAHAHAHA

Annamaria said...

LMAO.... I remember when you got BOB Brooke..LMAO...

You are hysterical!!!!! There is nothing to be embarrassed about. EVERYONE flicks their bean. If they say they don't they are LYING..And if by any chance they don't do it THEY ARE CONSTIPATED

DMoe said...

First BITCHES!!!

What da Bumba-CLOD!!

BO!!! BO!!!

Now that I got that out of the way, ummmm....Brookey. We gotta talk. I think you may be in serious need of an HBI (hot beef injection). This is like Botox for females.

Your estrogen's been on the war path lately, and I'm at work trying to read these blogs. WTH? I'm printing documents and can't retrieve them for these Harlemquin romance things you been spewin lately.(yep, I spelled it that way)



DMoe

DMoe said...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Smite me O mighty smiter!!

Annamaria, how did THIS happen?

Annamaria said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I'm LOVING it...I WAS FIRST and I didn't have to tase anyone!!! LOL

momo925 said...

Annamaria I'm happy you are first simply because you beat DMOE! HAHAAAAAAAA way to steal his thunder! LMAO

Brooke hats off to you! You definitely say what other people won't and I think thats why we all keep coming back lol, in addition to the fact that you are a very entertaining writer.

I think I may take your advice on catching that movie this weekend. Also let me know when you are heading back to the store again...I might need to make a purchase lol ;-)

Oh and HAPPY BIRTHDAY RAMEER!! May you have many many more!

DMoe said...

Annamaria,

Vengeance will be mine.

Momo,

When I want your opinion, I'll fax it to you sucka.

Blog adjourned.

DMoe aka Deonidas
"This IS Sparta!"

Georgia Peach said...

I just wanted to log on to say...whoa! I REALLY want to see this movie so I'm def going to check it out on Friday.

I like the "if you won't make love to yourself who will line" that's so true and I never thought about it from that perspective.

I'm blushing from this blog... bean flicking hmmmm I think I like it.

Annamaria said...

1. Happy Birthday Rameer. May you have MANY MANY more enjoyable years to come.

2. MOMO: THANKS :)

3. DMOE: this is for you:
http://www.nydailynews.com/news/us_world/2009/07/21/2009-07-21_man_sniffing_gasoline_bursts_into_flames_after_being_tasered_say_cops.html

Brooke said...

LOL! Y'all are funny :-)

You'd think I was giving out free lotto tickets to the person who is first on my blog ;)

Momo, I'm gonna make a trip soon, so we'll make a day out of it! LOL!!

...and I night ;) LOL!!

I could spend HOURS with that thing...TMI? ;)

Glee, I think I like it too. Cute movie :)

Annamaria, you're funny :)

Rameer said...

THANK YOU fro the birthday love! I'm actually getting overwhelmed with b-day love from non-family members - Facebook is a MUTHA!!! I feel so blessed and appreciated today!

Love Jones is MY FAVORITE love story EVER. And I declared it after seeing it opening weekend with my ex-girl...that film just MOVES me some kind of way. To this day, NO ONE can borrow that DVD from me.

"Flicking The Bean"?? I'mma leave this convo to the ladies. I'll be out and about celebrating my birthday all day anyways...but I wanted to at least check in once, and thank you guys who wished me a Happy Born Day. God bless!

Brooke said...

Have fun today Rameer!

momo925 said...

DMOE,

We have email now gramps...I know you're still into faxing, with your old a$$

LMAO!!!!

Don't start with me...I was talking to Annamaria NOT you!

Brooke said...

awww...here we go...PLAY NICE!!

I think I like the whole "hot beef injection" thing...where can I get one of those? ;)

The Cable Guy said...

Brooke baby, if you need a HBI, just call me...I got you!

This blog was fiya today!

Pretty Ricky What Dey Call'em said...

Broooke, I gotta say..this might be one of your best blogs!!! I feel like we are having an actual conversation... and if I laugh out loud and if ymmsomj... thats a great writer. Hats off to you today brooke!!!

Now as far as the topic... thinking about y'all flicking y'all beans is getting me a little excited!!! Don't nobody bother me for about 6 minutes!

Brooke said...

"6 minutes, 6 minutes, 6 minutes Dougie Fresh you're on...uh uh on!"

LMAO!!

Thanks Pretty Ricky, that means alot! :)

Dr. PLJ said...

I still can't get over the term "bean flicking!"

Brooke said...

I know right! I thought that was hysterical! But so fitting! LOL!!

JUSTBNME♥ said...

Hey Brooke & Friends ♥,

Now see..this is why I lurk everyday on this blog. It is awesome (hope that doesn't sound too corny)! Brooke, you've managed to take a very private and touchy(pun intended)subject and make it into an open and honest topic of conversation. LOVE THAT!

Brooke said...

Good, that's what it's all about! Healthy discussion.

There was a time when I would never have discussed this THIS openly, but hey...we grown :)

and don't just lurk, say something!

(well, you kinda just did) :)

Pretty Ricky What Dey Call'em said...

LOL... laughing at Brooke's excuse to be nasty. "Because we grown!!! LMAO" Grown is the new "Fast" LMAO

Just jokes Brooke!Love ya like cooked food... and u know I like cooked food!

Brooke said...

I guess that just means the older I get, the more open I get...and don't care! LOL!! I'm not "Fast"...if I was, I wouldn't need to "flick my bean!" LMAO!!

kanika U. said...

Happy B-day Rameer! Brooke I love that you have sex on the brain...love it love it love it. Welcome to the rabbit club. I have a pink one and my beau bought it for me. I suggest couples shop together at the sex toy shop it's part of the foreplay because all you're thinking about is what you are going to do to each other later with the goodies you buy. Can we talk about role playing...I have a handful of characters hanging in my closet.

Little Girl Blue said...

Okay...so. All I have to say about this is that I have more adult novelties now in a committed relationship than I have ever had in my damn life. Honey and I go shopping together and love trying out new things. We were in Las Vegas last week and hit up a spot there (by far THE best selection I've ever seen) and bought some toys...Like Luda said "Whips and chains, HAND cuffs..." Entire kits, all sizes shapes and colors...I ain't ashamed! Brooke, do YOU (literally). ;) Luv ya cuz.

SuSu said...

What a dirty little blog Brooke!! I LOVED IT!! LMAO!

Brooke said...

Good, I'm glad it's not just me! All my otha sista's got sex on the brain! Very cool!

Brooke said...

And Kanika, I've never done the role playing thing now that I think about it...hmmmm.....

love you back cuz, glad you had fun in Vegas!

The Fury said...

So sorry I missed this chatter. Brooke knows I bring the happy when it comes to this topic. (sigh) maybe next time. Especially since brooek has sex all over that sexy brain of hers.

Brooke, if you need some more toy reviews, I know plenty of sex bloggers that review toys and have great insight...

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