Friday, July 30, 2010
TGIF!
Sexy Survey!
1. Who do you find to be more sexy - single people or married people?
2. Is it okay for teenagers to have sex?
3. Would you ever tattoo someone's name on your body?
4. Do you have a sexual "pattern"?
5. Sex or money?
6. Was your best sex with someone you knew really well, or a one night stand/casual partner?
7. Are you loud? or soft spoken in bed?
8. One thing I wish my partner knew about me/would do regarding sex is __________ ?
9. Sex outside of marriage is ________________ ?
10. Sex inside of marriage is ________________ ?
Go!
-b
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Happy Random Thoughts Thursday!
- President Barack Obama was on The View today. I still love that man.
A question posed on the radio this was morning was "Do Black people still support Barack Obama?" While I don't assume ALL Black people supported him to begin with, it was an interesting question. They asked listeners to chime in - 5 of them - and the majority of them said they do NOT support him anymore. What say you? Are you still rockin' with our President, or not so much anymore? Were you ever a supporter of his? Let's hear it!
- I'll save my answer to that for the comments section if you all care to know, but I will say that I never get tired of hearing him speak. Say whatever you want to say about him, but the man is brilliant.
- I know money can't bring Sean Bell back, but I'm happy that some form of justice was handed down for his murder. No amount of money is enough. I hope his family is comforted.
- RIP to Lorenzen Wright. Sad news.
- Would any of you accept a marriage proposal via Facebook?
- Who's watching Jersey Shore Season 2? I know Rameer is :-)
- Did I mention how sexy Pres. Barack Obama is? :-)
- I've been watching Teen Mom lately. It's the best form of birth control that I know of right now.
- I can't believe Sunday is August 1st. This summer is flying by, but I'm enjoying it!
- Deebo tried to kill us last night - but I'll take it. Only 3 more sessions left. I counted one, but he's saying 3, so I won't argue with him :-)
- The RTT Throwback! Remember this one!?
Go!
-b
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Happy Tuesday!
Domina*tricks told me that she'd read my blog more often if I wrote like Fury. While Fury has erotica on lock, I figured I'd try my hand at a sexy blog for a day. Since TMI Tuesday is next week and my blog will belong to Fury (if he accepts), I'll use this Tuesday to test my sexy ;-)
*****************************************************************************
Turned Out
Have you ever been turned out? I think it happened to me last night. I was laying on my L shaped, cozy couch minding my own business. My phone rings unexpectedly, as I had already had all of my usual conversations with friends, family…and everyone else and said my goodbyes.
“I wanna come check you,” he said from the other side of my phone.
I looked at the clock and thought about it. I’m no where near sleepy, but it’s getting into booty call territory. Hmmmm…..
“Now?”
“RIGHT now.”
I figured since Flo was making an exit, that would keep me safe from doing anything I had no business.
“Sure…why not…”
10:45pm
I crack the door open just enough for him to slide through. I didn’t think my grey night shirt was inviting - I was trying to make myself less appealing just in case he had any funny ideas. It didn’t work though as he pushed me up against the wall to kiss me hello.
Uh oh…I’m in trouble now.
I invite him to sit and ask him if he’s allergic to my cat.
“I ain’t never scared of no p*ssy.”
Yeah...I’m in BIG trouble.
I smile at that comment, and try to ignore it at the same time. It doesn’t work. “I ain’t never scared” keeps playing over and over in my head like a musical refrain.
We sit, we chat and I think I’m doing alright. I’m keeping my head while we discuss the news, and how Sue Simmons was the shit back in the day. “She was fine! Too bad she’s a lesbian. Broke my heart.” He goes on and on about her….and I sit…transfixed.
I watch his lips move. Every word seems to stroke my libido and makes my blood run hot. Then my cat jumps up on the sofa next to me – that movement makes me jump…wipes my wetness.
“Oh no…not tonight. Tonight she’s MY cuddle partner.”
He picks up the cat and plants his paws gently on the floor. I look at my cat like “sorry” as my late night visitor turns off the tv, turns out the light and takes my hand.
“Come lay with me.”
This can’t be good.
He lays me down and rubs my brown legs. “mmmm…just as I remember, beautiful skin Brooklyn,” he says as he subtly appeals to my ego. He sucked my lips and then kissed them, savored them. Then he started talking to me.
“Tell me how you like it.” That question alone made Miss Kitty purr.
Before I could answer he was between my legs. I was about to be sent over the edge when he flipped me over. “I asked you a question. How you want it mama?” Is he he talking shit now?
I’m grown, so I try to be all woman in my response. However, “Surprise me” was the best I could answer. Miss Kitty was about to be bought and I knew it…and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I had to just hold on for dear life and hope that I didn’t go flying over the side of the bed.
“No, I want you to TELL me how you want it.” Damn, he’s a persistent muphucka ain’t he? He flipped me back over to face him, he stared at me waiting for a response.
“I don’t care,” I whispered in his ear.
He slapped my ass and said one more time “NO….TELL me…”
Did he just slap me? I think my pride was gone at that point.
“Kiss me. Touch me here. Slow…take me…slow.”
I wrapped brown sugar legs around his waist and locked him in, wouldn’t let him go no where. I flowed all over him, splashes washing our bellies, moans muffled by tongue wrestling kisses that make your mouth tired and your lips tingle.
As my legs collapsed, I was flipped over yet again…and served up lovely. Up until then, I thought I was in control, realizing that not many people get to see me like this. Every gasp, every moan, every shiver – he was slowly bringing it all out of me. I could barely move, but it felt too good to stop. He was trying to break me down and he wasn’t being very polite about it. I wasn’t going down without a fight though. My ego was getting stronger and I wasn’t going to let him make it better for me than it was for him.
But what to do? I was ready to take the gloves off and fight dirty, so I had to reach into my bag of tricks. I had nothin'. I used every sex muscle I had, and the only thing I could do was put a fresh squeeze on him…and just like that....
“No! I didn’t wanna bust yet!”
Got him.
Even if it did take 4 hours to get him.
After several rounds I couldn’t even call it draw. I lost. TKO – knocked the phuck out. He’ll be back though, and I can try again…I have to take some damn vitamins or eat some Wheaties or something. That was just too good to do just one time. I fell asleep smiling, could it be that I’m smitten. I didn’t know what I was missing until that man caressed my kitten :-)
"I ain't never scared..." I heard in my ear again. And he ain't neva lied.
Yes, I can admit it. For the first time in my life, I've officially been turned out.
-b
Friday, July 23, 2010
I woke up this morning with a smile on my face. Now, I have tears in my eyes that cannot fall. I found out that a friend of mine passed away this morning...gone way too soon.
We don't deal too well with death sometimes, especially when the person who has passed is young, vibrant and the kind of spirit that can move mountains. Kevin Nurse was such a spirit. He was a man who not only embraced life, but one who lived it to the fullest better than anyone I've ever known. I have a feeling he knew that his life cycle was about to be complete, and knowing that life is finite seemed to fuel his fire and he never took one single breath for granted. We should all live our lives that way...the way Big Kev did.
I know most of you did not know him, but we can all learn a lesson in how he lived his life. This is a man who died twice, and God saw fit to bring him back to do a few more good deeds, touch a few more hearts and for him to see his lifelong dream manifest itself. His awareness that our time on earth is measured drove him to find his meaning and purpose in life, and the realization of that deadline led him to reach for the moon, and grab a few stars along the way.
Although he is no longer with us here in the flesh, his spirit will be eternally present as he watches over us from the Kingdom of Heaven. Birth is not the beginning of life, nor is death the end - he has simply returned home and become One with God. Our hearts are heavy because we long to see his face again, hear his laugh, and gaze upon his smile...just one more time. But we have to remember in our time of grief that we don't bury our dead, but instead we plant them in the faith that their spirit is raised into a new, BETTER life.
I celebrate Kevin's life today as I offer condolences to all of his family and friends who loved him. Knowing him was a gift. He made sure that his stream of life was not dammed up, but flowing...OVERFLOWING. I can see his soul now...exploding into the sky like a beam of light...adding his flavor to the heavens, mackin' every angel in sight...Big Sexy, Big Kev...a spirit definitely too big for this world. And now he's set free - The Universe is his playground.
I love you Kevin. Rest in Eternal Peace.
-b
The Heart of a Chef
Thursday, July 22, 2010
It's a gorgeous day! Love the summer!
- My family is supposed to be coming my way on their way back from Niagara Falls! I hope they had a great time and I can't wait til they get here!
- Deebo tried to kill Monica and I last night. But he DID give us the BOMB rub-down after our workout...to the tunes of the Isley Brothers :-)
- If I were Shirley Sherrod, I'd tell them all to "kiss my ENTIRE ass!" (ala Della Reese in Harlem Nights). I'm happy she received an apology, but that whole thing was just wrong. She's on The View today. Pres. Obama needs to call her.
- I wish someone would ask me to pull over to the side of the road to text in my resignation. Again I say...."my ENTIRE ass!"
- I'm sick of Whoopi Goldberg defending Mel Gibson and every other racist out there. He said it.
He meant it.
- I need to drink more water today. I'm a bit dehydrated.
- Why is healthy food so daggone expensive!?
- Forgot to bring my lunch today :-( But it's too hot to cook.
- My cat licked my face this morning til I woke up. I know that grosses some of you out, but it made me smile :-)
- The Reeses in my candy jar are taunting me. Time to go get some yogurt.
- Anyone ever been to a nude beach? I've been invited to go, and I'm considering it. Not that I plan on being nude...but I might go see what the fuss is all about ;-)
- I'm sick of Drake. Really.
- I wanna get on a roller coaster. Six Flags anyone?
- I'd probably have a heart attack...it's been so long.
- It's almost the end of July already. Summer is flying by...make sure you're enjoying it!
- Random Thoughts Thursday Throwback!
Go!
-b
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Happy Hump Day!
Happy Birthday Rameer!
Speaking of hump days...how many days have all of you ever gone without "humping?" I ask because of a Dear Brookey letter I received today...and here it is:
Dear Brookey,
I wanted to get your take on something to see if I'm normal. I can go weeks, months or even a year without having sex. I have sex moreso out of obligation than out of desire. I have a boyfriend who I've been with for over a year. While he never complains about our sometimes weeks long droughts, he's confused as to why I love to cuddle, snuggle and kiss and hold hands, but don't feel the need to have sex all the time. I know he loves me because he never pressures me and always makes me feel loved and desired, but I'm wondering if there's anything wrong with me. What do you think?
-Sexless
***Disclaimer: I'm not a sex expert and I have never had this problem...EVER***
Now...this is very interesting to me - not because you may not have a high sex drive, but because you're affectionate, yet not sexual. I love to hug, kiss, caress, nibble, stroke, cuddle and snuggle too - and if it leads to sex...EVEN BETTER. So I think that's why your boyfriend is confused, because most men I know associate a woman's touch with sex. If you so much as breathe too hard on them or brush against their arm, they interpret that as some sort of sexual overture. I think most men assume that if a woman wants to hug and kiss, she better be ready for more - cuz that's where they're headed.
It's great that he doesn't pressure you and always makes you feel loved. If your relationship is healthy, then I wouldn't worry about it or assume that something is wrong with you. Some people just aren't hyper sexual people and don't have a high libido - and if nothing is physically wrong with you, then I wouldn't stress it.
Now, there may be an emotional reason why sex isn't something you desire - right now. Some men and women can be very loving and affectionate, but fear the emotional intimacy that comes with sex. You two probably connect in other ways, but sex may bring you closer than you're subconsciously willing to go right now...so you keep that part of intimacy at bay as long as possible. Again, I'm no expert, but this might be a reason why you can go long periods of time without allowing someone to get THAT close to you.
I don't think you should be having sex out of obligation either. I feel you should genuinely WANT to have sex when you do it - not because you've counted the days and it's the third Wednesday of the month, so you might as well get it over with. Maybe you can explore different places or positions to make it more interesting. Even good sex can become routine, and if you've been together for over a year, then maybe you should try to find ways to spice it up a bit. Try role playing, taking showers together, watching some sexy movies together - SOMETHING.
I always worry that my sex muscles will atrophy from "non-use," so I've never purposely abstained from sex. Trust me, if I'm in a drought, it's not MY doing :-) I know that going weeks without sex can happen with couples who have kids and who get busy with work, but I dread that...along with wearing "mom jeans." I think it's every couples' responsibility to keep their sexual lives in tact...and thriving. You are no exception.
But this letter makes me wonder - have any of you ever PURPOSELY given up sex, and if so...WHY??? Was it for a spiritual reason? To "find" yourself? To be able to tell the jerks from the gems? I'm curious.
I've never gone on a self-imposed sexual hiatus. I've had a few droughts, but that is because there was no one in my bed and my toy was broken. And it's also because I don't long for sex strongly enough to the point where I'd have sex with just ANYone. I'm at a point in my life where casual sex is just something I'm not interested in...so I'll just go without. While we all know great sex can be born from a good relationship, we also all know that a good relationship isn't necessarily born from great sex.
I say all that to say, if you have a great relationship...the sex can always get better. There is nothing wrong with you (that I can tell...but then again...I'm not a professional), so just be grateful that you have a wonderful boyfriend who loves you just the way you are...dry panties and all :-)
-b
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Good afternoon everyone!
So, as usual, I didn't have any idea as to what I would write about today until I got an email from my "play future baby daddy." He sent me a link to an MSNBC article where NY Mayor Michael Bloomberg weighed in on Sarah Palin's racist mosque tweets. I didn't get a chance to watch much news the past couple days, so I was unaware that she tweeted this recently about the proposed building of a mosque at Ground Zero:
On Sunday Palin tweeted: "Peaceful New Yorkers, pls refute the Ground Zero mosque plan if you believe catastrophic pain caused @ Twin Towers site is too raw, too real." "Peace-seeking Muslims, pls understand, Ground Zero mosque is UNNECESSARY provocation; it stabs hearts. Pls reject it in interest of healing," she added an hour later.
One of Bloomberg's aides, Andrea Batista Schlesinger, responded "@SarahPalinUSA whose hearts? Racist hearts?"
I have to say...I wonder the same thing. In the interest of healing? Unnecessary provocation? Why would building a place of worship stab at hearts? Because the people worshipping there would be Muslims?
What many people fail to remember is that Muslims died on 9/11 too. Not just Christians, or Jews, or atheists...but Muslims as well. They and their families suffered great loss too. Would it stab at Muslims' hearts if we built a synagogue at Ground Zero? A church? Is that more acceptable?
There are many paths to God, and each of us walk our own path. My sister and I grew up as Christians, and we sang in the church choir, attended Sunday school and learned the stories of the Bible. My sister is now a practicing Muslim. Often, the religion we practice isn't one that we've chosen on our own, but more so one that was passed down to us from our parents and grandparents...the religion we were born and baptized into.
But my sister's spiritual awakening came through Islam. She takes comfort in its teachings - and if your salvation is at stake, then one must decide what works best for him or her and embark on that spiritual journey in search of self. We stand at the mythical, pearly gates alone, and our salvation is way too important to leave it up to someone else to decide for us.
Personally, I believe God is One, and everything made from the Creator returns to its source. I don't believe those who perished in the 9/11 attacks went to a gold street-lined Heaven or were condemned to eternal damnation - but rather I believe they became one with God again since all paths lead to the Divine. Whether it be a church, a temple or a mosque - the place where we worship to sustain and nourish our spiritual selves cannot be viewed as place of pain, but one of healing and faith.
No one person or building can tell us who we are or how we should be - least of all Sarah Palin. It is not for her to judge what brings pain, what would stab at our hearts or what would heal us - because all of that comes from within. We have to listen inwardly to dictate how we act outwardly. We have to trust what is true for us, and not the ideas and values of others who speak out of ignorance or hate. Christianity, Buddhism, Hinduism, Judaism, Islam - all of these religions boast extremists who fashion religion into one of their own making. Many have enslaved and murdered innocent people in the name of their religion. Those who flew planes into the Twin Towers are not the peace seeking Muslims who would pray at a mosque at Ground Zero - but rather the ones we should be praying FOR at a mosque at Ground Zero.
Building a mosque at Ground Zero doesn't mean we celebrate the hate that brought those buildings down - it means we conquer it. Every major religion of the world has similar ideals of love and the same goal of uplifting the human spirit. Whether a church, a temple, synagogue or mosque - the common goal of all these holy places is to teach love and humanity where its followers steer away from negative acts caused by ignorance and hate, and walk the path of goodness which leads to the temple of the heart.
-b
Monday, July 19, 2010
Happy Monday everyone!
Yolanda snuck in the pic :-)
and last but not least - Rameer...muzzled! Yolanda got him good!
Priceless!
It was a great time - see you all on the blog manana!
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Happy Random Thoughts Thursday!
Sorry there was no blog yesterday - I had nothin' and was busy at work - my bad!
- My bangs are too short.
- I missed Fences’ run on Broadway…dagnabbit! Next time Denzel!
- I’ve been wanting chocolate all week and have resisted...but I don't think I can make it to Friday without eating a Snickers.
- I think our intern has developed a girl crush on me ever since I told her her driver’s license picture wasn’t “that bad.”
- I miss my nephews...we had such a great time last weekend. I might sneak thru Philly on my way back from the SU DC BBQ to see them before they go to Niagara Falls for vacation.
- Then they’re stopping thru the NYC to see me! I don't know how they're all going to fit in my small apartment, but we'll make it work!
- I hoard umbrellas. It’s a sickness.
- Why are men and women’s shoe sizes different? Anyone know?
- If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes? Maybe I can find out the answer once I go to the zoo :-)
- Bristol Palin is engaged to her baby daddy Levi Johnston. I doubt I could marry anyone who talked greasy about my family like he did.
- I have no desire to watch Chad Ochocinco on tv - but I did catch this on The Wendy Williams Show the other day. Why do we care? Do you care who he chooses?
Should Black women even bother going on dating shows?
- We have only four more sessions with Deebo - this saddens me. I hope we can do it on our own!
- Vitamin Water Zero is nasty.
- Justin Bieber is cute, but I still don't get it.
- Mel Gibson is straight trippin'. That dude is in big trouble. Leave it to Whoopi Goldberg to defend him.
But then again, she dated a dude who thought it was cool to go out in blackface, sooo....
- Do we still support his films knowing that he's a nut? He needs prayer.
Although Jesse can go a little to the left out his neck when he speaks sometimes, he sort of has a point:
Dan Gilbert deserved to be fined, he was way out of line.
- Brian's RTT Throwback!
Go!
-b
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Happy Tuesday!
So I was watching The Wendy Williams Show last night, and one of her guests was a woman who wrote a blog dedicated to women who choose not to have children. While the discussion mainly touched on parents' rights vs. the rights of those who are childless, one thing she said struck me. The guest said she gets hate mail because of her decision not to have children - and most of it comes from WOMEN.
I thought that was fascinating, but at the same time, it seemed to make sense.
If a man says he doesn't want to have children, no one really a blinks an eye at that. After all, it's believed that the paternal instinct is not as strong as the maternal one. While this may not be true in all men, no one thinks twice about men who decide they don't want children. George Clooney has said he doesn't want children, and that doesn't stop him from getting a date.
Okay, so George Clooney isn't the average dude...but you get my point.
However, if a woman says she has no desire to birth any babies, something must be wrong with her right? Women are supposed to be maternal and nurturing by nature, so if she has no desire to have children, then something must be off. And it's usually women who believe this. While a man may be surprised that a woman doesn't want children, he may not necessarily think something is wrong with her. But I've heard women say things like "She's selfish" or "She must have had a bad childhood" in order to justify their judgment of the childless woman.
Here are a few myths I've heard regarding women who don't want children:
1. She's a lesbian. This has to be one of the most absurd things I've ever heard. But I've heard it. Just because a woman is attracted to other women doesn't mean her maternal instinct isn't there. There are plenty of women who are lesbians who long to be mothers, so to think that a woman must be a lesbian if she doesn't have any children is ridiculous. Two women (and two men) who are in partnerships can be parents, and heterosexual men and women can decide that being a parent isn't something they want to do with their life. It's a lifelong job, and if you don't want to do it, then you have every right not to want to take on that responsibility.
2. She's selfish. Yes, being a parent is a selfless thing. You usually have to put the well being of someone else before yourself. It's one of the hardest jobs in the world - if not THE hardest job. I get that. Which is why if you KNOW you aren't up for the challenge or the job, you shouldn't take it on. It's not necessarily being selfish, but being realistic and honest about what you want from your life. If you'd rather sleep in late every weekend, or take spontaneous vacations that don't require you finding a sitter or taking the kids with you, then that's your right and your choice. There is nothing wrong with being a little selfish if being childless makes you enjoy your life more and make you happy.
3. I've heard (along the same lines of being selfish) people say, "What if your parents had felt they way you feel...you wouldn't be here." Again, this is foolishness. We are not obligated to do what our parents did, or make the same decisions. Yes - life is a gift, but it's a gift from God. He chose your parents as vessels to bring forth life, but if a person is meant to be here, they'll be here because it's Divine order. Your parents may have wanted to be parents...or maybe not. The decision was theirs and children don't ask to be here. But if you know you DON'T want to be a parent, then the child you don't have won't know the difference.
4. She must have had a bad childhood/been molested. There are some women out there who don't want to have children because they are afraid they won't be able to give the child a better upbringing than she had. Or she may be afraid that she won't be a good parent because of psychological damage she's suffered from some sort of trauma. While this is sad, and sometimes true, that doesn't mean ALL women who don't want children have gone through some tragic experience growing up. Each case/situation is different, and women shouldn't assume that women who don't want to have kids have some deep dark, hidden reason for not wanting them.
5. She CAN'T have children. I've actually had men and women ask me if I was able to have children once they found out I didn't have any. Not only is that a personal question, it's a ridiculous assumption to make. While there are women out there who want them but can't have them, there are plenty of women who have nothing physically wrong with them...but just have no desire to carry a child and birth one. It's as simple as that. I've heard women say, "Maybe she's had too many abortions and can't have any now." That has to be one of the most ignorant and troublesome statements I've heard regarding women who don't have children - but you'd be surprised the things people come up with.
6. She doesn't like children. I know plenty of women who chose not to be parents, but who lead full lives with the children around them. They are wonderful aunties and Godmothers...and they can give the kids back after they're done playing with them. It's totally possible to love children while not wanting to raise any yourself.
No matter what society may tell us, it's totally possible to have a wonderful, complete life WITHOUT children. There is nothing wrong with not wanting to share you life with any biological children, but serve as a role model, mentor and/or Godparent to children of friends and family. Forget what anyone else thinks...and until they're ready to raise your child for you and pay for its daycare and college tuition, everyone else can keep their opinions to themselves and mind their own business.
-b
Monday, July 12, 2010
So, am I really the only person who likes the zoo? Rocky Balboa likes the zoo :-)
But seriously...is the zoo just a child and/or woman thing?
I asked a friend recently to take me to the Bronx Zoo. His response?
"Uh...why?"
I told him I thought it would be a fun thing to do for the day.
"...uh...okay...(laughing)"
"What's so funny?" I asked.
He said, "What is it with women and the zoo? Why do women like going to the zoo?"
I never knew that going to the zoo was a "woman" thing. He ranks it right up there with endless shopping trips, big purses, flip flops and Tyler Perry movies. I mean...I admit, I've never heard a man say to his boys, "Yo son, let's go to the ZOO!" But at the same time, I never viewed it as a "non-manly" thing to do. If Rocky can take Adrian to the zoo, then what's the big deal? :-)
Maybe it's the "cute" factor. I don't consider myself a "girlie-girl" in the least. We've already talked about my tom-boy past and how I shun makeup and doing my hair. But something about swinging monkeys and baby koala bears gets me all warm inside :)
I understand that walking around all day looking at animals who seem to do nothing but watch you back is boring to most people, but for some reason I find it fascinating. I read all the information listed about each animal, from it's mating habits and migrating trends to when they shed, how long they sleep and what they eat. As many times as I've been to the zoo, I find that I can never learn enough about all the animals there. I guess it's because I'm an animal lover - and even though I'm terrified of snakes and know that alligators can kill and eat me - I'll spend a good half hour staring at them in the Reptile Building. I know...call me crazy.
But is the zoo a "woman" thing?
I said to my friend, "What's the big deal? My nephew LOVES the zoo!"
He said, "Yes, but he's SIX."
Okay, fine, I get it.
I can see calling the zoo a "child" thing because children have a natural curiosity about animals and nature that brings a sense of wonder to their eyes. I guess after the age of ten, the wonder should be gone - but for me, the feeling of discovery at the zoo has remained with me well into adulthood. The sight of a new baby panda melts my heart. A mother licking her baby cub on the scruff of his neck makes me smile. And a big elephant spraying water with his trunk in order to keep cool is just...FUN to me. I know lions and tigers and bears can maul me to death - but stick them behind a fence or some glass and I simply want to give them a hug. I know...maybe it IS a bit crazy. But it's locked in my DNA, I can't escape it!
But is it "girl" thing? Who knows. All I know is he promised to take me to the zoo - and I plan on holding him to that promise...and he's gonna like it!
Tell me what you think is a "man" or a "woman" thing - go!
-b
Friday, July 9, 2010
TGIF!!
Okay, what the hell is going on? I woke this morning to rants on my radio from angry New York Knicks fans on Hot-97.
"F LeBron, he dissed us!"
"I hate him now! I hope the Knicks murder the Heat this year" (yeah right)
"Forget about LeBron, he's a sell-out!"
Huh?
Call me crazy, but did ANYONE really believe LeBron was coming to the Knicks? I mean, really? Sure, it would have been nice if he came here. NYC doesn't really NEED a boost as far as cities go...but it would have been MONSTER had he been "the King of NY." I get it. I didn't see it happening, but I get it.
But if anyone should be REALLY disappointed, it should be Cavs fans. After all, he's the hometown boy who's done a lot for that city in the 7 years he's been there. Any city would have gotten a boost if LeBron had joined their city's team...but Cleveland NEEDED it...and probably still does. Miami and NYC would have been just fine without him.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Happy Random Thoughts Thursday!
- This day is starting off rough for me :(
- My curling iron broke while I was only half way done with my hair...so I'm looking really crazy right now. I'm supposed to meet the girls later for drinks, so this is not good. I need a drink though, so my hair is just gonna have to look crazy.
- Deebo tried to kill us last night - but I needed a good workout.
- So...who's watching "The Decision" tonight? AKA the LeBron media circus :-) I'll be glad when he finally announces his decision so we can get all this nonsense over with. Here's a question - is this display from LeBron "arrogance" or should he cash in on his decision like everyone else? And will the pressure be greater on him to win a champion after all this hoopla - or was the pressure always there? Any guesses as to where he might end up? Do you care? :-)
- I don't feel like being at work today.
- I just had the strangest urge to buy boots.
- I need another vacation...NOW.
- I feel like I have no idea what's on tv...and I work in tv. How sad is that?
- Not in the greatest mood right now.
- I keep getting calls from places who received my resume somehow asking me to come in for interviews for positions I never applied to. I suddenly feel the need to order my credit report. Very strange.
- I think Rameer and I have been in a "poking" war for almost 2 years now on Facebook :-)
- Mel Gibson doesn't like anybody does he? "Wetbacks?" Insane.
- Witches Brew is off the chain today! Love that site!
- Brian's Random Thoughts Thursday Throwback!
Go!
-b
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Hey everyone!
Sorry I'm late, been slammed at work! Ugggh! I need a new laptop...like...YESTERDAY!
I'm working on it!
Anyway, let's get to it!
Dear Brookey,
If you were married, how many times a week would you have sex with your husband? If the answer is not often (say...only once a year or a few times a year) and your husband cheated and you found out - what would you do? A. Forgive him and give him all the sex he wanted so that he doesn't have to go outside of the marriage anymore or B. Keep doing what you're doing and have sex only when you felt like it. If you went with "B" - would/could you be mad if he cheated again?
-Curious
Dear Curious,
I don't know ANYONE who would go with option "B" unless they truly didn't care about their marriage...but I'll get back to that in a sec.
To answer your first question, I'd have as much sex as my husband could stand. Now, I realize I may have a stronger sex drive than most, so my expectations may be a bit unreasonable - but if I could have sex every day, I would. I know sex changes after marriage...or so I hear, so I'd think that anyone who was healthy enough for sex would want it often. I'm sure adding children and the stresses of everyday life to the mix can affect how often couples have sex - but you have to be willing to make time for it. Sex in a committed relationship is important. Very important. And no matter how tired I am, or stressed I am, I'd think making time to connect intimately with my partner was a priority in order to keep things in balance. It's only right :-)
Now, of course I'm saying all of this as a "non-married" person...so keep that in mind. I'm also saying all of this as a very sexual, sensual, sensation seeking person too...with no kids :-) But most couples I know who are happy have sex regularly, and even schedule it into their lives to make SURE days, weeks or months don't go by without having sex. Just imagining that a month could go by without having sex with my man is baffling to me - let alone a year. That's grounds for divorce if you ask me....and a few states would agree.
To answer part two of your question, if I cared about my marriage, I'd choose option A - but first I'd have to figure out why I was interested in having sex only a few times a year (again, baffling to me). I'd make an appointment with my doctor asap to see if there was anything physically wrong with me. I've heard that certain conditions can lower your libido - such as diabetes or hypertension. Once I determined if I was healthy enough for sex, I'd seek counseling to see if there were any underlying emotional reasons why I wasn't interested in sex with my husband. Sometimes deeper seeded issues such as depression or resentment can cause you to reject or draw away from your partner sexually. Hopefully we'd seek counseling together so that I could understand his reasons for committing adultery. While he may have simply needed a physical release since I wasn't providing it for him, it could also be that he was seeking an emotional connection as well. Sex is a way for people to feel close to each other - and as much as we think of that as a "woman" thing, men crave that intimacy as well.
If I chose option B, I'd FULLY expect my man to cheat on me again. While I would never condone cheating, I can see how it could happen if someone feels rejected. Everyone wants to feel wanted or desired - man OR woman. If your spouse doesn't want you, the minute anyone shows you any attention or displays an attraction to you, it's only natural to be drawn to that and act on it. If I'm not loving my man, someone else will...and I can't be mad at anyone else but myself for that. If I was swinging from the chandeliers every night, that would be one thing. But if I find reasons to NOT have sex with my husband for weeks or months at a time, then something is wrong and I wouldn't expect him to be faithful - because that would be selfish. I know wedding vows mean a lot, but so do sex and intimacy. If you want your marriage to work and you want your spouse to feel wanted, you'll make time to love them. Simple as that.
Or is it so simple? Am I missing anything? Tell me what you think...GO!
-b
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
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Thursday, July 1, 2010
- The weather has been PERFECT the last couple of days. I love summer!
- I'm off tomorrow and Monday, so no blogs from me (unless I become inspired to post something). Otherwise, the next blog you'll see is Fury's TMI Tuesday blog on July 6th!
- I made a steak this morning and I can't WAIT to eat it. Gonna be DEEEEEE-licious!
- What to do for the 4th weekend? Any suggestions?
- Someone told me I look "svelte" today - love hearing that. Still have a long way to go though - but I'm doing it!
- Guess who got tickets to see Jay-Z and Eminem at Yankee Stadium? ;-)
- I should buy stock in Snapple. I really should.
- If I wrote a book, what would I write about?
- This morning on the train, I almost sat on this guy's lap when the train jerked as I was sitting down. I apologized and he said, "No problem. I've always wanted a lap dance first thing in the morning." Once I get in better shape with Deebo, the pole dancing class is next...then I'll master the lap dance :-)
- I already miss my braids...I sweat my hair out in the gym.
- Here's a question: Which would you rather have - a cheese steak with cheese whiz on it, or a chicken cheese steak with mayo on it? Choose wisely...this is going to settle a bet :-)
- Soul Siesta next year will be in Mexico! I've never been there, so BEST believe I'll be going! Woo-hoo!
- This is Serena's Goddaughter Kayla - congrats to her on her graduation!
- Last but not least is Brian's Random Thoughts Thursday Throwback! This was my JOINT!!! Still IS!
Have a great, long weekend! Go!
-b