Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Can I just say....I love Barack Obama! Watching him sign the health reform bill this morning was amazing. Congrats to him! Congrats to us all!
Now...can I ALSO just say I hate when fools ring my phone at 3 and 4 am. I'm tired as hell today because someone decided it would be a good idea to see if I was awake at that hour. He will get the cuss out later today.
Why do men do that? Why do women do that? Unless I've given you the firm "go-ahead" on calling during booty call hours, don't do it. It's not cute, and it'll guarantee that you'll never get any. EVER.
Nothing dries me up faster than an inconsiderate man. My phone ringing in the wee hours of the morning tells me that he was only thinking of himself and what he wanted...whether that was simply to talk, to see if I'd be up for a visit, whatever. There was no consideration as to if I was asleep, if I had to wake up early for an early meeting at work (which I did) or if I would even entertain a conversation with him. This is someone I've had no previous "nookie" relationship with, so how in the hell would he think he could call during "nookie" hours?
Baffling. And rude.
I've known plenty of men who had the potential to get it, only to do or say something stupid to ensure that they will never, ever see it or smell it. Most times, all they have to do is play it cool, try not to say anything too crazy, and be patient...and chances are the woman will come around and break you off a lil somethin. But nooooo....y'all wanna jolt someone out their sleep and then make them cuss you out for it. Stop the madness.
While I'm on a rant, here are some other things that dry me up:
- Worse than an inconsiderate man is a desperate one. Don't ask me on our first date when you can hit it, or try to bed me too soon. Over-eager and over-anxious is not sexy. At all.
- Dirty fingernails, funky underarms and bad breath. Please bathe and brush your teeth.
- Loud, attention seeking men. Okay dude, I see you...bring it down a notch. I don't need to hear King Lion roaring all the time trying to get my attention. Be a bit more creative than just being loud for no damn good reason.
- "Pants on the ground, pants on the ground...you looking like a fool with your pants on the ground!" Pull your pants up, you're over 30 for goodness sakes! Grow up.
- Wack conversation/Idiot men. Nothing is "un-sexier" than a man who can't "conversate." And yes, if you say, "can we conversate?" - I'm done talking. Ignorance is a total turn-off.
- A bad kisser. If you can't kiss....if you wet my whole face up, bite my lips to the point where they're red and swollen, or peck at me like a bird, then the va-jay-jay will dry up like the Sahara. Trust.
- Wack sex. You only get ONE time to cum before I do. Do it more than once, and it's a wrap.
- No oral skills. If you don't like it down there, then don't go down there. I'd rather you just stayed away from Miss Kitty than pretend to know what you're doing. It'll just piss me off.
- Bitchassness. Nuff said.
Ladies, tell me what dries you up. Fellas, tell me what makes you...uh...limp...I guess? :-)