Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Happy TMI Tuesday!
Okay, so yes...you read that title correctly. And you can probably guess what today's blog topic will be about. If you're squeamish, then just log out now and come back tomorrow :-)
Yolanda pretty much dared me to write about this. She and I were going back and forth on Facebook about how freaky our future baby daddy is. If you're late to the discussion, I'm talking about Maxwell. During his concerts, he says some pretty colorful things. Things like, "and when we wake up, I'll still be inside of you" and "I don't care what time of the month it is, I'll just put a towel down."
It's that last comment I'd like to discuss today...especially since Yolanda pointed out, "Now THAT'S a blog topic!"
I laughed at first, thinking I'd NEVER write about partners having sex while the woman was on her period. We'll call her period "Aunt Flo" for the sake of this blog. Again, if you're a punk...be out! :-)
But then I thought about it and decided to give it a try. Why? Because I'm at my HORNIEST during that time of the month. I know, I know...you didn't need to know that - but what is today? RIGHT! It's TMI Tuesday!
I will admit, I've had sex when Aunt Flo was in town. I haven't done that in a LONG time, but I have. Some men won't come near a woman during Flo's visit - and I get that. If I were a man, I might get a bit freaked out too. After all, when we see blood, we think someone is hurt or injured - so freaking out is a natural reaction of fear in us...especially if we're not expecting to see it. Females are the only creatures on earth who can bleed for 3-5 days and not die!
Other times, it can be because a man feels like there is something shameful or gross about menstruation in particular, which while common enough to call normal, tends to be based in a lack of acceptance of women's real bodies - as well as very outdated and uninformed ideas about women and menstruation in general.
Those attitudes aren't just limited to men. Some women feel embarrassed about or ashamed of Aunt Flo, or just feel that menstruation is a time they'd rather spend alone for any number of reasons - from religious or spiritual beliefs to a preference to just lay on the couch, eat a pint of ice cream and watch movies rather than having sex.
But that's not me. Women often experience high levels of arousal during menstruation because of decreased estrogen in their bodies at that time - so maybe that's why I'm a horny nut basket when Aunt Flo is paying me a visit. Maybe on the first day I'd prefer to be left alone. Actually, it's probably best that you don't see me. I get debilitating cramps, and I'm usually in a fetal position most of the day. However, if my cramps have subsided by day 2, but are still mildly present, sex knocks them right out! After all, cramps are caused by the contraction of muscles...so what better way to alleviate the pain than by WORKING those muscles? :) A good orgasm can actually help with cramps...that is if you can find a man willing to give you a good one! I found that having had sex during menstruation actually made my flow end faster. And sometimes it stops all together! Sweet!
(still with me...or are you getting woozy yet?)
Ahem...moving right along.
I know what most of you are thinking - sex during menstruation can be messy. You're right. It probably is. As Martin Lawrence said - it probably looks like a crime scene when you're done. The trick is to put down dark towels...that way you don't see it and it doesn't freak you out...as much. But you know what? Sex is usually already messy in some way - at least the kind I have. What I mean by that is with most kinds of sex, we're already dealing with fluids (and some lubricants) that will often stain sheets or clothing - so adding Flo to the mix is just a little...extra.
But if you're truly worried about coming in contact with Aunt Flo, use a diaphragm so that it'll contain flow during sex without obstructing the vaginal opening. Poof! Flo is gone...at least for a little while anyway. Just remember to take it out!
Another added bonus for some women who chart their fertility is that they know that during menses, they as individuals (remember, all our cycles are different) are far enough away from ovulation that there is a low risk of pregnancy. Just that peace of mind adds to their enjoyment of sex if they can decrease their concerns about getting pregnant - unlike that poor woman who got pregnant WHILE she was ALREADY pregnant. Buffoonery.
Okay, I think I've traumatized you all enough. I tried to be as tactful as possible about a subject I'm sure we've all talked about at some point or another. Just remember, whether you're a man who has no trouble running red lights...and you're a woman who has no problem letting him - ALWAYS use a condom. Some sexually transmitted infection risks can be higher for partners during menstruation - particularly for blood borne viruses like HIV or Hepatitis. So while safe sex is always important - it can be especially important (particularly with more casual partners or with new sex partners) - for sex while Aunt Flo is in town.
I usually just have to suffer and entertain that bitch til she leaves...but I'm always glad to see her :-)