So yesterday, a guy friend of mine told me that he "manscaped down there." I thought that would be a given for him since he always keeps a fresh cut and stays fresh-to-death-dipped when it comes to his wardrobe. But he said it wasn't your typical trim - he was completely bare down there for the first time ever...and he's diggin' it.
This was a bit TMI, but he dared me:-) Hey, if you like it, I love it.
We've asked the question before on this blog - do women like it when men "manscape?" Some said yes - they consider it clean and a courtesy. Others said no - they thought it was too girlie. Which got me to thinking about other things that many men and women may consider "girlie" but not necessarily "gay" when it comes to men. So I've come up with a list of things that are perfectly okay for men to do, but that might get them the side-eye because it's just a bit too feminine.
1. Manscaping. Since we're on the subject, I have no problem with men getting manicures and pedicures. I hate seeing chewed up fingernails and jacked up toes. If you don't do it yourself, then by all means go to a salon and handle that. I don't mind a man trimming down there either, or under his arms, nose hair, ears, etc. But I think I draw the line at plucking eyebrows (unless you have a unibrow). No clear nail polish, and if you use a "loofah" and strawberry shower gel, you might get the side eye. Jus sayin'.
2. Cooking. It's perfectly okay for a man to be able to throw down in the kitchen. I actually prefer it. A man who cooks for me is sexy all day every day. But I don't think I can say I've ever seen a man I know "bake." You know, cookies, cakes, bread...anything. My brother-in-law made these fried Moroccan cookie things once, but I think that's as close as I came to actually seeing a man make something sweet. It's okay if he DOES bake, but most men and women consider baking a "woman" thing.
3. Dancing. I love a man who can dance. Usually, a woman can tell how good a lover a man might be by the way he moves on the dance floor. Nothing "girlie" about dancing. BUT - if he's a ballroom dancer, or rocks some ballet slippers, he might be pushing it. I love watching Dancing With The Stars and enjoy watching a man freak the Paso Doble...but some women think the Waltz is a bit much for their taste. I don't have a problem with it, but some think ballet isn't the manliest way to move his body.
4. Reading girlie magazines. I have a subscription to Essence Magazine, and I may occasionally have a Cosmo or a Marie Claire lying around. And I've seen men pick them up and casually peruse them. I didn't think anything of it - but some women think that's weird. If you ask me, what better way to learn about women than by studying what we read? Either way, most men never admit to reading women's magazines - they just "sneak" and do it in the doctor's waiting area or "borrow" their sister's or girlfriend's magazine when they're not looking :-)
5. Crying. A new world will be built before a man will let you see him cry. I don't think anything is wrong with that, but it seems to only be acceptable at a funeral or when someone passes. I've seen men cry at the birth of their children, at weddings and even at sporting events when their team loses. But if he cries at a chick flick or while watching Oprah, women will undoubtedly call him a punk.
6. Shopping and fashion sense. I love a put-together man. If he can sport a Hugo Boss suit with some funky Kenneth Cole shoes, then point him in my direction. But if he can tell me what size a woman is at first glance and asks her if she's wearing Jimmy Choo's, then my spidey senses might go up. I know some men love a woman with a mean shoe game, but if you say my Manolo's are "fierce," then I might think you were a judge on America's Next Top Model. Most men don't spend hours in the mall trying on clothes either, and you definitely don't shop in pairs like women tend to do. And if a man walks up to another man to ask him wear he got his "outfit," then I'm walking in the other direction.
7. Drinking "girlie drinks." The only time I've ever seen a man partake in an alcoholic beverage with fruit and an umbrella in it is on vacation at the swim-up bar. Other than that, it's Henny or a beer or vodka or something that'll make your chest hairs grow. They may "sip" their woman's Cosmo to make sure it's "okay" but other than that, men usually don't order Appletini's.
8. Yoga/Pilates. I've seen men do it, and have no issues with it...but I know a lot of women who don't like their men doing these exercises. They want them to lift weights and play football and growl and whatnot. Maybe they'd be satisfied with them running on a treadmill, but something about yoga makes them think he's a hippie or something. Hey! Yoga is HARD! If a man can do that, then he's stronger than you think. If it's cool enough for Russell Simmons, it's cool with me.
9. Dieting. When was the last time you heard a man say he was going on a diet? I'll wait.....
Most men say they have to "drop a few pounds," or "get in shape." They say they have to start eating right, or cut out the junk. I don't think I've ever heard a man say the word "diet" in relation to himself. Ever.
10. Gossiping. Men talk just as much, if not MORE than women. But they don't like to call it "gossiping." They just say they were relaying something they heard, or "giving you the 411" or something stupid like that. But they do it. I guess if you do it around a water cooler, it's not "gossip" - they're just talking over some coffee or something. Say what you wanna say, but men are just as bad at this as us clucking hens are.
I'll stop there. I could add more, like watching chick flicks and wearing excessive amounts of jewelry, but I won't get into that either :-) If you can think of more to add, let's hear it!
Over the years, I've been blessed to have spent time with, befriend, love, learn from and share experiences with people who have helped me grow and inspire me everyday. They have shared words of wisdom, strengthened me with encouragement, gave me joy with a smile, comforted me with a hug, gave clarity to my visions and dreams and renewed my spirit with faith. It is through family and friends that I manage to be happy and hopeful.
These relationships work because we share our philosophies, our personal truths and an outlook that prompts us to seek something greater in all and in ourselves. Sharing a journey heartedly illuminates our lives and enriches our experiences. It keeps us moving....always evolving....ever changing.
I have been transformed by the wisdom, opinions, insights and revelations of those who have shared their journey with me. It's a blessing I long to share with you through my first ever blog. For me, writing is a reflection of my own direct experience and I look forward to all of you sharing your thoughts and experiences with me.
So...with that said....can I just say.....??? :-)