Friday, June 10, 2011
I don't know about you all, but at least 5 of my Facebook friends posted this link to their Facebook page. Watch...and cringe. (Sorry about the ad you have to suffer through first)
Embarrassing: Man Proposes In The Club In Front... by thehiphopconsultant
Yes, it was probably very embarrassing for him to be rejected in a club...but we'll talk about rejection later. He proposed...IN A CLUB. Maybe for some women, that might be romantic. But for any potential suitors of mine I might have out there - don't do that. EVER. A club? Really?
Anyway, I think it goes without saying that you probably shouldn't propose unless you know she'll say yes. I think that's common sense, and I think most men know that - but clearly this guy misfired...badly.
Most people have discussed marriage prior to actually getting engaged. It's important to find out how the other person feels about having kids, how to RAISE the kids, finances, division of chores, merging accounts, religion, etc. prior to actually asking for someone to spend the rest of their life with you. If you have never talked about marriage, you should before thinking about proposing. They might not even want to get married. Or they might not want to get married TO YOU.
But if you all DO decide that you want to marry each other at some point and you're planning on proposing, may I suggest a few places where you SHOULD NOT propose? This is just a list according to Brooke - and some of you may even think the places I'm going to list are wonderful places/ways to propose. To each his/her own :-) But if anyone is ever planning on proposing to ME - let's just say I might find these places questionable. Feel free to add your own:
1. At a basketball/football/sporting event:
Stereotypically speaking, men love sports. But unless your beloved shares that feeling, you should probably avoid the "jumbotron" proposal. There’s nothing less romantic than screaming, drunk fans who probably couldn't care less about your proposal - and if you propose at a Philadelphia Eagles game, be prepared to be booed...whether she says yes or no. And if you get rejected, the jeers will ALL be directed at you.
2. The "Hide the Ring in her Dessert" Proposal:
Aside from it being a choking hazard (make sure you know how to do the Heimlich Maneuver), your bride-to-be really doesn’t want to have to hunt for her ring in a chocolate lava cake or accidentally drink it out of a glass of champagne. Worst-case scenario, she swallows it and you have to spend the next three days waiting for your fiancee to pass it. Save yourself the time and the latex gloves and simply pull the ring out of your pocket at the restaurant when you want to propose. Besides, you don't want to trust the waiter with something that costs 3 months salary.
3. At someone else's wedding:
Remember that scene in The Best Man where Taye Diggs proposes to Sanaa Lathan at Morris Chestnut's wedding? Wrong for so many reasons. Your boo may not want to share one of the most special moments of her life with anyone else, especially not a bunch of wedding guests she may not know. And it's just rude. That day is about the couple getting married, not you or your girlfriend. The proposal should be about your lady...and someone else's wedding should be about them. It's thunder stealing haterade...and just plain wack!
4. On vacation:
Only acceptable if you know she’ll say yes, because it’s impossible to escape if you’re rejected. Imagine she says no...now what? Y'all gonna be all mad at the pool? Are you going to go crying on the beach? Arguing over breakfast? For seven to fourteen days? Not a good look. You might just break up permanently, and your vacation is ruined.
5. On finding out she’s pregnant:
Searching for the right words to propose?
“You're period is how many days late? WTF??!! You told me you were on the pill! You're keeping it? Shit. I suppose we’d better get married then.”
Yeah, that ain't it. Nothing about those words sounds loving or romantic. Just because you and your unmarried partner find out you’re expecting, it’s not an excuse to phone in a half-assed proposal. Propose because you want to marry that person, not because the condom broke.
6. By phone/email/text/Facebook:
Speaking of phoning in proposals....just...NO. Email, text, dare I say Facebook? Don’t even think about it. The same applies to a paper note, with check boxes saying "Yes, No and Maybe." This will only work if you are nine years old and your wedding guests are Power Rangers.
7. During sex:
I know my loving is good, but c'mon son. It doesn't count. We all say funny things during the long stroke, but a proposal should never be one of them. In T minus 30 seconds, you’ll probably feel quite differently, and/or be asleep. But trust me, she'll remember...and she might call "no backsies!"
8. On TV:
Wouldn’t it be fun to take something private and do it in the most public forum possible? No it wouldn’t – too much pressure and potentially very embarrassing...especially if you're on live tv and they can't edit it out. And if you do it on tv, and she says no, it'll be on YouTube, Facebook and Twitter before you get home (like the poor fool in the clip I posted who proposed to his girl in a club).
What other ways/places to propose are potential disasters for things to go horribly FAIL? And if you have a proposal-gone-wrong story, feel free to share :-)