Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Happy Fantabulous Tuesday everyone!

So I don't leave work til 9p last night. Just call me Kizzy.

I got home a little before 10p, took two packages of strawberries out the fridge so I could cut them up and make them nice and juicy for today, and settled in to watch a little tv. I watched the season finale of True Beauty (I have no idea why) while I ate an Edy's Lemon Popsicle because it was too late to eat any real food. I'm mentally exhausted, so the thought of writing a blog post for today was daunting to me. I barely wanted to get up off the couch.

But I manage to drag my wagon into my bedroom, slip into a my favorite comfy night shirt and slide into bed, laptop buzzing. My yahoo and AIM automatically sign in when I log on. Let me see who's on Facebook.

That was the beginning of the end for me. Let's just say I didn't write my blog last night and I didn't go to bed til after 1am.

This morning when I woke up, Que Deezy (Big Boy's sidekick...is it "Boy" or "Boi"?... anyway) is asking the question, "Does Facebook make you fat?" I think about this while I'm brushing my teeth. Hmmm....?

I don't know about fat, but if you've been having a hard time taking your ass to bed on time like I have the past few weeks, Facebook can be your drug of choice and won't help your insomnia. It'll only feed it. Can't sleep? Go on Facebook. Someone is ALWAYS up writing about some nonsense and you'll be up all night reading it.

Let me give you an example. I was intrigued by a comment thread going on between Dre and Rameer and some folks I didn't know. They weren't discussing politics or the hottest music out (by the way, thank you Rameer for the free Abstract download!) No, they were discussing someone named "Chicago Larry" from For The Love of Ray J. Yeah, I said Ray J. Now, I don't watch such shows unless I'm at Su's house. No interest. But can I just say, I was almost intrigued enough to drag my ass out of bed into the living room JUST to see what the hell was so damn funny.

ALMOST.

But I was too tired, and my IM chat with Latinegro kept me in the bed.

Hmmm...maybe Facebook IS making me fat...or at least LAZY :-)

I don't read nearly as much as I used to since Facebook. Well, a BOOK I mean. I read articles posted on Facebook or magazines that I can get through in 15 minutes in between IM chats. Myspace never had this effect on me - I could go days without checking Myspace. But Facebook? I don't know what it is. I had been on Facebook for a while and never really understood it's appeal....until I was off for 2 weeks over the Christmas holiday. It was then that I said to myself, "let me see what this fascination is with Facebook." Well, clearly I had too much time on my hands, because now it's interwoven into the fabric of my day.

Now that I blog everyday, I feel like my laptop is always on. It's the best gift my sister and brother-in-law ever gave me. My journals have been neglected now that I prefer the hum of the computer. I still always have a pen and journal on me so I can jot down something on the train or wherever. I stop working in the middle of the day if I'm inspired to write a poem, and I still prefer to write it by hand before committing it to my hard drive.

But as soon as I get home, the laptop comes on - after I take off my shoes, before I change my clothes, after I go pee, before I turn on the tv, as I check my voicemail before I eat. That's my routine lately. Sad isn't it?

There are ads running on the subway that say, "Log Off, Make Face Time." "The Original Instant Message" - (A man and woman laying in the grass kissing I think) "Friend Request Accepted" - (two people hugging). I like those ads, I think it's for Dentyne Gum or something. I can't remember.

I don't think my friendships or time spent with loved ones has suffered because of Facebook or any other online social network. As a matter of fact, I think it's brought me closer to some folks and helped me to establish NEW friendships.

I feel like Rameer is my boy now...and I can barely remember if I ever had a conversation with him in school. I consider Serena a sister-friend who is the head of my spiritual team...yet I've never given her a hug in my life. If it wasn't for Myspace, I may have never known or met Amanda. And I recently became reconnected with two of my cousins that I grew up with - David in Vegas and Tony, now living in Orlando with his family. Through Facebook, I got to see videos of Elizabeth (Tony's wife) dancing in the living room with their daughter Alexa, a video of them singing Happy Birthday to him on his 40th birthday, and David was able to shout me out telling me he gets 67% off at Jimmy Choo and I better hurry up and get in touch with him. Message on my wall: "I gotta look out for my cuz!"

David is 35 years old, but in that moment reading his comment, I felt like we were back in Bensalem as teenagers seeing each other in the hallway at school between classes. "You staying after school coming to my game?" David would ask me. "You know I'll be there big head!" I would say back. I saw David almost everyday of my life from kindergarten to when I graduated from high school. He lived on the other side of the neighborhood we grew up in...a few streets over...a 10 minute walk.

We went away to school and lost touch. Started working, having lives, moving all around and time just got away from us. Now we're back in touch like nothing happened. Same thing with Tony. He joined the Navy, got stationed all around the country moving his family with him and we lost contact. But Saturday night, Tony and I exchanged posts on each other's wall while I waited up with him - a nervous father expecting his 15 year old son home at midnight from his first house party. Post on my wall: "2 hours and 14 minutes and counting." Damien got home safely and we logged off and went to bed :-)

I say all this to say, social sites like Facebook and Myspace may make you lazy, may keep you up late at night, may make you less interactive in real life, and it may even make you fat. But you may find out things about the people in your life that you never knew before. You may make new friendships that last a lifetime. Through photo albums, tags and videos, you may find that you can check in with all the important (and not as important) people in your circle without skipping a beat. You just may discover that you can remain connected in ways you never thought possible.

-b

29 comments:

Anthony Otero said...

Me first

Anonymous said...

1. Latinegro..You didn't comment about the blog therefore your first DON'T COUNT...BBBBBZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

2. I deleted my facebook page over a month ago & do not miss it at all..

The driving force in deleting it. Yes I understand that it's a great way to connect with people etc etc. BUT some people LOSE their damn minds & feel the need to post all of your business on Facebook. If I didn't put it there I personally don't think you should. Secondly there were MORE than a handful of people that found me on facebook & stalked me. I hadn't wanted to be found by these people. There was a reason I didn't keep in touch with them.. LMAO.. Obviously they didn't get that hint.
Last & not least. My baby is my baby & AT LEAST FOR ME.. My child is someone I will share with my friends & family of my choosing. I really don't think it would be appropriate for my child's pic & info to be all up on my page & like I said I know someone in particular that I will definitely be having a chat with PRIOR to August because if not my baby's picture will be all up on his facebook page & I ain't having that!

Brooke said...

LOL!! Annamaria, don't act like you've never yelled "FIRST BITCHES" and not commented about the blog! LOL!! Ant, watch out, she's got her taser out!

And yes, I agree that if not managed correctly, Facebook pages can be damaging. I think it depends on the people you allow in. I think once you understand how to gain some sort of control and balance with it, it can be a good thing. Just depends on how you use it. But I do know some folks who abuse Facebook or feel the need to post blackmail shots in their "Old School Pics" album LOL!! But most of my friends tell me or ask me if they can post such things...and it's usually all good. You can't take stuff like that too seriously sometimes.

I agree you have to use some discretion in posting pics of kids, babies, etc. It's all about our own comfort levels. I know some extremely private people who are still on Facebook who use is mostly for networking and promoting their business. As long as we don't use it to hurt anyone, I think it can be a great thing.

Anonymous said...

Tell him Brooke!!! Tell him! lol And yeah I know I've yelled first without reading from time to time but then I always make sure I go back read & comment immediately so that I am both first & second! THOSE ARE THE RULES!!! Who's rules I don't know but that shit sounded good didn't it??? LMAO

Brooke I guess your peeps have A LOT more common sense & curtesy than mine do. Most just post whatever they feel like without regard to anyone else. And unfortunately I really don't feel like I should sit here & have to tell some grown folks to have some common sense!!! LMAO.
My comfort level is at zero & for me it's best to err on the side of caution.

Anthony Otero said...

Annamaria...dont hate the playa...hate the game.

Facebook is crack. I love it because It keeps me in touch with old friends and family. There are people I have not seen in years!

But, once my family started joining, it was a wrap. I know that I was able to actually plan out when I went to see them this past December. Sure, I could have done that without FB, but with their pics there and the constant messages, I doubt it would have happend.

Brook knows we could have talked all night...damn Facebook crack.

Brooke said...

I know! I would type, "damn Ant, it's 1am, let me take my ass to bed." Ant: "yeah, you're right, me too." Me: "dagnabbit, I forgot I left the strawberries on the kitchen counter, now I gotta go cut them up and put them in the fridge." Ant: "I just finished eating some chocolate covered ones" Me: "Dre annem are talking about Ray J's ass" Ant: "LOL!"

....15 minutes later has gone by and we still talking about nonsense....CRACK!

Anthony Otero said...

LOL...I am mad you pulled out the transcript!!!!

How were the strawberries??? :)

Anonymous said...

If I'm up at 1am (which is rare these days...) trust me the LAST thing I wanna be thinking about is the computer. I will be doing one thing & ONE THING ONLY... LMAO....
Now we know why I'm 4 months pregnant! LOL

Brooke said...

Don't you know I forgot to bring them suckers to work today! I'm so mad! I bet they'd taste SO GOOD right about now!

Brooke said...

Annamaria, clearly I have no man, cuz otherwise if I was up, I would have been doing that too...not wondering what they're talking about on Facebook :-)

. said...

Thanks Myspace :-)

Anonymous said...

Brooke. There is always broken Bob! LMAO....

Brooke said...

Yes, THANK YOU MYSPACE!!!

People think I've known Amanda for years, like we grew up together, by the way we are. I'm like "I met her on Myspace" and people always go "NO WAAAAAY!" LOL!!

See, membership has its privileges :)

Brooke said...

Annamaria, I just saw your comment for some reason...and no, BROKEN BOB won't keep me up at night! LOL!

E.Payne said...

So this is how it goes on a typical evening over that the house where I holler:

1. Like Brooke, I come home, power up the laptop, do what I need to do with myself and the family, all the while checking my blog, my Facebook page (to promote my blog), Twitter and all da rest a'dem and dey mama.

2. My wife then accuses me of cheating on her with my laptop and we eat dinner. I pull myself away and use every ounce of my strength not to log back on as soon as I'm done eating. (I go sneak off on my iPod touch and log back on)

3. I begin to fade while watching tv and my wife screams at me to stay awake. We put the kids to bed.

4. After the kids are asleep, my wife tells me she's got to check on ONE thing on our desktop (either an email or some website she's researching) before going to bed.

5. About an hour after number 4, I wake up on the couch to the sound of my wife laughing to herself. I go over to the computer to see her on Facebook with no less than 4 IM windows open. One is Georgia Peach, who she saw a few hours earlier at work. Another is a former next door neighbor of hers. The next is a former college roommate she was barely cool with at the time. And finally a former high school classmate who now lives in the deep deep South.

6. Then she says, "I really need to go to bed." I have a meeting first thing in the morning.

7. Then she stays up a little longer.

8. The next morning she wakes up ten minutes before she's supposed to catch her train.

But I'm the one with the problem.

Facebook is crack.

Brooke said...

E, your house sounds hilarious! I thought I was bad. I can barely get to bed before 2am nowadays, but I've been aiming for midnight the past couple weeks, so I usually make it to bed by 1am. But it's mainly because I'm trying to write my blog the night before, not really because of FB. It just keeps me company :) But I need my sleep...I need to write more and stay off FB so I don't get distracted. I may need an Intervention.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like you ALL need intervention. Austin would TASE me if I ever ignored him for the computer & vice versa. We have a strict rule to be in bed at a certain time every day. NOT ASLEEP. Just in bed with no interruptions. Just time for each other. ; )

Georgia Peach said...

Ok I have to admit that I'm addicted to FB. I go home and it's the first thing I check...Honestly it has put me back in touch with a lot of folks from high school, college and past jobs so for that reason i'm cool with it.

I decided a long time ago to be selective about the folks I add - and most of the peeps on my list now are people that I like and want to know a little bit more about.

E- you're right your wifey and I do talk on FB after work even though we just left each other. I need an intervention.

Anonymous said...

OK I take it back you guys aren't that bad... THIS dude however needs a serious facebook intervention:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29366043/

Anonymous said...

Myspace was cool for business for me. Got great connects. Facebook is great! Reconnected with everyone except for a couple people I have been wanting to connect with. Creating a elementary school reunion from Facebook...Myspace on a personal has more of a "jumpoff" vibe. When I see my youngins in the Apple store checking their account to see what street to me someone at for the jump off it was time for me to fall back.

Brooke said...

I never got that vibe from Myspace, but I guess that's what the kids use it for. To be honest, with the exception of Amanda and like 5 other people, all my friends on Myspace were truly my friends or people I already knew. I made a few new contacts here and there, and many of those were by accident :-)

You still have to be careful about what information you put out there and who is who. There are some crazy people out there who will stalk you, phish you or try to steal your identity. It's really just about being smart and savvy about these sites while having a good time.

Anonymous said...

My Name is April....and I'm Brooke's Blog Stalker ;o) ....and I'm fatter because of Facebook....and catching up on Brooke's Blogs....HOLLA!!! (see Brooke....you never know when I'll actually say something...unprofound as it may be). I'm actually planning my....*cough cough* 2nd High School reunion (watching out for lightning to strike at me) on FB. I would die if I couldn't have my FB....however, I REFUSE to get on FB Chat....I'd get fired for sure.

Brooke said...

My "LURKER" April! LOL!! So nice to hear from you!

FB chat is deadly, you're a smart woman to avoid it :)

I haven't reconnected with enough people from high school in order to arrange a reunion, but I'm sure it's coming :)

...and why would lightning strike you? you don't look a day over 18 ;)

Anonymous said...

Hey people,
I am not that addicted to facebook yet but I do agree with you on connecting with past friends and family...I need to check it more often....But as for blogs I am totally hooked...I follow so many now that I can barely keep track....Even on my own blog, I am always thinking of what to write about, and forget it if I get a new follower!!!! I like a junkie then....I got some sort of problem...Like I am being accepted into blog world...Someone recently stop following me and I was so upset....I may need counseling soon :(

Brooke said...

LOL!! I'd be upset if someone stopped following me too! But when I get a new follower, I'm like "yay!" It's silly really, but it's so appreciated :-)

And I agree, I usually try to carve out at least a half hour to dedicate to reading my friends' blogs. If only I could dedicate as much time to the gym I'd be GOOD!

Anonymous said...

How 'bout it!!!!! If blogging was a sport I'd be skinny!!! LMAO

Brooke said...

WORD! me too! I'd be a freakin Olympian! A gold medalist!

Anonymous said...

Today was an incredibly busy day for me...so I didn't get a chance to check Brooke's blog. Funny thing it's about Facebook...cuz she hit me on Facebook and told me she gave me a lil' shout-out on here, and I was here with the quickness! Lol!

I'm A HUGE addict. So much so one of my best friends SWEARS I never sleep because of the random nature of some of my postings at times. I have reconnected with so many people on FB, and strengthened bonds with others. See, the people I normally talk 2 and see - we don't chat as much on FB. But those I don't normally contact in-person or via phone - we gets it in! Lol!

Facebook has been good for me personally, business-wise and even emotionally. And I agree with Brooke - it's way better than Myspace. I never had a personal Myspace page; only one for my TV show that I share with the co-creator. But my FB page is all me. And I don't have Annamaria's problem of people stalking me - cuz I'm a blunt person. I won't add your ass, and then block you to boot! And if you ask me why I ain't add you, I'll say "cuz I don't like you like that, sucka!"

I feel like Brooke is my peoples due to Facebook, and speak very kindly and highly of her. I get to re-connect with cats like Dre and get into silly ass discussions about Ray J's show - which, by the way, is my new favorite guilty pleasure. And before y'all jump on me, that was the first time I watched an entire episode...cuz someone ON FACEBOOK told me to watch it to see some really funny sh*t - and MY GOD was it funny! I'll never miss it again.

Facebook, at the root of it all, when used properly, is a way to stay in touch with people and connect with their lives when WE want to. I can see how my boy spent his birthday thanks to pictures, even though he's thousands of mile away. I can laugh at a friend's dealings with his all too grown 2 year old daughter, who thinks SHE'S the parent sometimes. And, when a friend is depressed or upset, I can send some calming words in their inbox and help put them at ease a little - even though it's the middle of the day, and neither one of us have the time to talk on the phone.

Facebook is great because it helps us really connect, and keep, maintain and even strengthen these connections. I've helped people get jobs on Facebook! Helped people move to cities. Given advice on relationships...and LORD KNOWS I've gotten my silly argument on (I'm currently in a war with like 4 S.U. Deltas...they drew FIRST BLOOD...).

I literally feel funny when I can't check it for hours. I feel like I could be missing something. Hell, today I had an Alexander O'Neal moment - and shared it with all my Facebook pals! IT was groovy...lol!

Give me Facebook, or give me...well, just give me Facebook. I ain't takin' it THAT far...lol!

Now if only I could find me an Amanda like Brooke found her on Myspace...i-yi-yi!! Between Brooke and Amanda, a brotha be yearning for some Brooke's Cafe! Lol!

I can't do the FB chat thing, though. I did it before, and was missing assignments at work...too many people hit me up to chat! Cuz I'm actually very cool with about 90% of my FB friends - it's not really a popularity contest for me like it is with some. If I added you and didn't know you beforehand, it's because we connected somehow and I liked your vibe. But there are a few that slipped through the cracks...I think I'mma delete their asses THIS WEEK. Lol!

That best of Q-Tip album I sent you is DOPE, Brooke - wait until you hear these 20+ unreleased Ne-Yo songs I'm sending you next week...

POKE!!!

Brooke said...

Rameer! I knew I could find your ass on FB LOL!! And like you, I genuinely like or know about 90% of my FB friends and I check in with all of them. I agree, you can check in when you feel like it, IF you feel like it, and either everyone can know (by leaving comments on walls or status') or no one can know and you can keep it moving.

I've talked to so many people from school on FB and had so more great conversations from there than I have in 4 years of college. Some of these folks I only knew by name and face at school, now I comment on their pages like I've known them for years. It's like we're all grown up, but still young and vibrant at the same time. And while we share pride in where we came from, we've moved on to be adults with real lives. but can still reach out and get to actually KNOW some people we never felt the need to even speak to before. I don't think that would have been possible without FB, at least not for me...so I love it for that reason.

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