Monday, June 28, 2010

Chris Brown Meltdown

Happy Monday!

So yes...we're gonna chat about Chris Brown...again. I didn't watch the BET Awards in its entirety last night, but I turned the channel just in time to catch Chris Brown's tribute to Michael Jackson. If you missed it, take a look:



Say what you want to say about Chris Brown - but he KILLED that performance! Every step, crotch grab, moonwalk, glide was ON POINT! I was with him all the way...until.

"Is he CRYING?" I said out loud.

Yep, he was crying.

At first I thought "gimme a break!" I thought he was doing it for sympathy and cool points. Was he distraught over MJ's passing, or was he reflecting on the words of the song he was supposed to sing? After all, Man in the Mirror starts off, "I'm gonna make a change, for once in my life...." Maybe the words grabbed a hold of his heart and he couldn't shake them enough to get them out. As he fell to the ground, I started thinking maybe he WAS in agony, feeling the pain of someone who's had to look in the mirror for the past year and a half and work his way back.

Articles I read this morning, bloggers, and even the ladies of The View wondered if Chris Brown was "faking it." But as DMoe pointed out this morning, "when you're blowing snot bubbles, that sh*t is real!" Hey, after all...the man is human.

No one has to like anyone for any reason. If you believe Chris Brown is a jerk because he's a woman beater, then that's your right. It seems we relinquish forgiveness to a God somewhere outside of ourselves, until it's time for us to ask for forgiveness. Although we're all fully qualified to forgive, we do it when it suits us. We can give forgiveness freely or withhold it...but we'll ALL have to ask for it one day.

Too many times we see our lives as one big drama unfolding frame by frame like a movie. But unlike film, we can't edit out the scenes that don't fit the picture we think our lives should reflect. Every frame counts, every take is a good one. How we view them is up to us. I'm sure Chris Brown would love to edit out many scenes of his life, just like the rest of us would. But every person in our experience who has hurt us, or whom we've hurt, is a frame in our film - a part of our life, whether we like it or not. We can see each frame as a defeat, or we can view each hurt and misfortune as an integral part of the entire film.

Each frame shows us how to live and love by example. Each mistake teaches us a lesson and challenges us with our greatest opportunity to grow. I'm not saying anyone has to forgive anybody for anything. But bitterness, like love, creates after its kind. When we criticize and condemn others, we wound ourselves - and our resentment rarely disturbs the person who "offended" us...but rather it destroys the host. Forgiveness is a pain reliever - it frees those who forgive...and the forgiver benefits most. "Judge not, condemn not." Easier said than done, right?

Usually pangs of conscience are self inflicted and private. But Chris Brown showed us last night that moments from our past that we'd like to erase don't always come back to us in moments of quiet reflection...but can haunt us at any time. But the deeper truth of his meltdown is that that could be any of us. We all have our regrets - some secret guilt or private embarrassment that we've carried around inside...maybe for years. It may be something we said or did to someone we love, someone we've long lost touch with, someone who remembers the person we were back then rather than the person we've grown to be...unaware of how we've changed.

The wisest thing we can do is to always choose love, because it heals everything in its path. Ask the Spirit to give us a forgiving heart - and give people a chance or the benefit of the doubt...no matter how painful it may be. Staying in the light, even when we don't want to, is the key to self-mastery - and as we forgive, so are we forgiven.

-b

45 comments:

Latinegro said...

First Bitches

DMoe said...

Dammit Ant.

Monica said...

Go Ant! Beat DMOE!

Go Ant! Beat DMOE!

LMAO!!!!!

Georgia Peach said...

Good one Brookey...I even saw this clip this morning - it was all anyone was talking about...You're right sometimes we're not able to forgive even though we want to be forgiven ourselves...God knows I definitely have some moments I'd edit out of my life.

Yolanda said...

I don't like what Chris did, nor do I care for how he and his PR machine handled the aftermath of the domestic violence situation... HOWEVER, how long do you punish a person? Why are "some" celeb screw-ups okay but others aren't? If the mainstream can keep Charlie Sheen on TV and some of these jacked up athletes on the field... then why can't Chris Brown make a comeback?

I'm still on the fence about him overall, but he did a great job with the dancing portion of the tribute. That cannot be denied. Time will tell whether he's truly sorry for what he did. I think he deserves that opportunity. Now, would I DATE him or encourage any woman to at this point? Hell to tha naw!

Sidebar: El DeBarge sounded GREAT! Clearly, drugs have only affected Whitney's voice!

Jay said...

Great blog B! I saw this last night and thought "oh brother!" But after he was SOBBING, I thought maybe the words were too much for him.

I've always prayed that he and Rihanna move forward from that whole thing. He's taken his lumps (no pun intended) and he has a long way to go. But like all of us, we can either do better once we know better, or we can continue down the wrong path. Hopefully CB is choosing the right one.

None of us are beyond reproach, your blog was a good reminder. Thanks for that!

ejackson said...

great blog today brooke!!!!

Brooke said...

His actions going forward will determine if he's sincere or not. That's something he needs to work out within himself.

I thought El DeBarge was the only one who DIDN'T do drugs?? Maybe I got the story wrong.

I missed the Prince tribute.

Latinegro said...

I have been talking about forgiveness for a long time. Some people cannot seem to do it because of the realization that they too may also be forgiven for the wrongs they have have done, which is a scary thought if u think about it.

Most people cannot even forgive themselves and hold on to things. This is why I try not to judge. I am not a fan of Chris Brown not only because of what he did, but for the fact that he never seem to take real responsibility.

I do not know if the tears are fake or not. But as someone that knows how it is to finally look in the mirror and see that shit aint right...it makes you brake down.

Stef said...

If we can forgive Charlie Sheen, drug addicts like Robert Downey Jr, and assholes like Kobe Bryant, then Chris Brown can dance to Michael Jackson and cry like a baby. I loved his performance, and while I probably still won't go buy his cd's, I can give credit where it's due. He didn't sing and that was wack, but I loved the dancing part. And if he couldn't sing cuz he felt bad or felt sorry or was reflecting on the words of the song, then so be it. Like you said B, that could be any of us and we've all done something we're not proud of...we're just not on the front page of US Weekly when we do it.

JUSTBNME said...

Again lady, extremely well said and well written.

Brooke said...

thanks Liz and Jay - and Stef, I agree. Most of our transgressions aren't in the spotlight - thank goodness!

Brooke said...

Thanks JustBNMe!

I have to remember to heed my own words sometimes :)

Monica said...

I think Chris Breezy KILLED it last night. I've always felt that whenever there was a tribute to MJ, he was always the person missing. Last night he had his chance to pay tribute to one of the people that has influenced him the most. It was probably a combination of the fact that he finally got a chance to do what he's been waiting a year to do and the words of the song (considering all that he's been through). I do not like that he apologized for the umpteenth time to his fans when he won the award at the end. I feel like that was more PR than his actual meltdown. Everbody makes mistakes and he shouldn't have to relive/ pay for them for the rest of his life. However, he should never forget what got him to this point and move forward in his life with the knowledge and humility that he learned from this situation.

DMoe said...

Loved reading this B.

I'm of the same opinion that breakdowns don't discriminate. If one's coming, it wont care where it reveals itself.

A self-prescribed fall from grace can hurt a performer, cuz all they hear is either applause or silence.

In Chris' case, I'm pretty sure he was absorbed by Michael Jackson all along to be the performer he's been. That part was tough in itself i'm sure.

But this dude's brought an onslaught of hell on to his otherwise charmed life, and it appeared to crush upon him after he heard the applause he so desperately has been seeking to regain. He killed that MJ stuff, and singing "Man in the mirror" just proved to be too much for the guy.

"Gonna make a change, for once in my life...."

Wow. let's see how things move beyond this with him.

DMoe

The Cable Guy said...

Brooke, does this mean you forgive Kobe Bryant?? LMAO!!!

Great blog as always. And you're right - we can condemn someone all day long...until it's our turn. I know I've had to ask for forgiveness many times...and I know I'll need to in the future. While I don't hit women, I'm FAR from perfect. Good points made B, you're a good soul.

DMoe said...

Oh and Mo...

As for you and your lil comment earlier, feel free to agitate the gravel...

(read: Kick Rocks!)

Love,
Dmoe

Annamaria said...

GREAT BLOG BROOKEY B! LOL

I was spending somet time with a friend going thru some stuff & I missed it all. BUT if RhiRhi can forgive & move on with her life then who are we to hold a grudge. This kid's mistake was done in the public eye & he not only got convicted in a court of law but in a court of public opinion. AND frankly I think we can all agree we are harsher than any judge on a bench.
Did he deserve it ABSOLUTELY... BUT can we forgive & give a second chance YES..
He's taken some steps to show he's sorry & he still has a long way to go BUT if we have a chance to help him NEVER do that again WHY NOT...
It also took a lot of guys for HIM of all people to go up there & kill it the way he did so Chris Brown GOOD LUCK!

Brooke said...

I don't hate on Kobe every chance I get, I just don't cheer for him either :-) ....baby steps, Cable Guy...baby steps :-) LOL!!!

The Cable Guy said...

Okay B, I'll take that! :-)

You're not a real hater anyway :)

Rameer The Circumstance said...

Well, I have no idea if you read my FB status about people "forgiving" him due to one performance, Brooke-Ra - and I have no idea for certain if it was a real reaction or fake. But I will share this with the blog...

As is the case with many of us who work in TV, entertainment, media - whatever - I tend to know people in different circles. I have a connect over at Jive - truth be told, before Chris Brown ever blew up off his first hit, he offered me an exclusive interview, and I turned him DOWN thinking the kid would never be a star. I'm reminded of that by people who know about it all the time...

Anyway, this guy handles and deals with MANY of the bigger acts. Oft times, I deal with him on different music acts...last year after MJ's funeral aired, he had a convo with me and a lot of my peoples. We were talking about the funeral, and he told us how upset heads were over at the label that Chris couldn't perform there. In just being candid, he said how everyone KNEW if Chris was ever given a big stage like that to do a MJ Tribute, everything would be forgiven and forgotten, and he'd be on top of the world again. He said they were LIVID - felt like they had missed the opportunity of a lifetime, and no one who performed during the funeral could've used that pop moreso than Chris.

Here's the good part.

So he says how Chris had been instructed to do things, and how he hadn't listened to some people. But he said if he had been allowed to perform, Chris' people would've had him go out there, KILL IT (cuz we all know dude can dance his arse off), shed some tears and get emotional - and GAME OVER. When one of the other cats suggested that might not have worked, he said "are you KIDDING ME? You know how people are - they'd eat that ish up and he'd go double-platinum if we had an album come out within a month or 2 of the performance!"

That is a 100% true story.

Again - I can't know whether it was real or fake. But I can't help knowing how pissed they were last year, and see that scenario described play out today. I took people to task on being all against him, and all of a sudden forgiving him cuz he gave a dope performance. Really? Really, people? Not cuz he said anything deep or expressed real remorse...

The fact is, Chris Brown gave some corny interviews that even the most ardent fans read as insincere and obligatory. From what I've seen, the only emotion he's consistently displayed publicly over all this time is anger and indignation over the awful (and well-deserved) impact this incident had on his shows, album sales and overall career. And now he gave a knock-out performance - something the kid could always do - and all is forgiven.

It's corny as all hell to me. And FAKE. I'm not saying people shouldn't forgive him, or feel as strongly as I do. But I know for me personally - when a celeb does crosses certain lines for me, I'm pretty much done with them. There are other entertainers or things to amuse or delight me - losing one ain't ish. And we become numb to bad behavior and certain things that honestly goes on with most celebs - but for me personally, rape, pedophilia, murder, violence against women, and a few other things are just too reprehensible. And once I find out EVERYTHING I possibly can and get the true picture - if I find someone to be guilty of that activity, I choose to not be on their "team" again.

Again, don't expect everyone to think or act like me. But I personally saw A LOT of hypocrites in my FB feed last night - the same type of people who were disgusted at Robert Kelly, but all was good once he dropped another catchy club tune. And that's complete WACKNESS to me.

My 75 cents - as always.

Latinegro said...

Nice Blog Rameer! :)

I will agree with the FB fuckery last night. It was worse on twitter when it came to him. I didn't see the performance until now because I was watching a better show (True Blood).

Rameer The Circumstance said...

Damn you Ant - I WILL take it out on you in Scrabble, chump! Lolz!!

Brooke said...

I didn't see all the reactions of FB, but to me, saying Chris Brown killed his performance is the same as saying Kobe has a mean fade-away. That's why I don't begrudge anyone for liking or not liking whomever they want. All I do is ask that people who choose not to like someone for whatever reason give the same respect to others who may not like a certain celeb, etc.

I hate it when people tell me I "should" like Kobe. I can separate what he does on the court from who he is a person. While I don't know Kobe, R. Kelley, Breezy, Tiger or anyone of the other celebs named PERSONALLY, we can all form our opinions about them based on what we see. I have not problem with that because it's human nature. Just don't ask me to support him because he won a championship. I've never denied his talent, just like I won't deny that Breezy killed that performance. That's what he does. But if someone doesn't want to like him because he beat up a woman, or someone doesn't want to like Kobe because he's an adulterer - just be consistent with your perspective. I think we get into trouble when we start comparing sins...saying adultery isn't as bad as woman beating and everyone does it. There's no excuse for beating a woman, cheating on your wife, killing a dog or peeing on a 15 year old. All I ask is that no one tell me who to support because they feel their "crime" is less reprehensible than someone else's.

But one this is for sure...we ALL have sinned or done something that can be considered morally questionable. Breezy's performance isn't what makes him worthy of forgiveness...being human is.

Anonymous said...

Chris brown is young...black...male....raised in an abusive home...in west bubba Va...who made it to be a global actor / singing sensation. who also is trying to fix / understand something that grown arse's dont even understand...generational abuses..(violence, alcohol, drugs...etc)add to that he is in an industry that takes the best and spits them out worst or dead through violence, suicide, addiction...etc. Chris Brown made a mistake...however considering his circumstance...and the way he handled it..he deserves a second chance to make a change. He is doing alot better than some of his peers...Lindsay Lohan..(they cant get enough of this chick-drugs..alcohol..drunk driving..) britney spears(same as above=plus poor parenting)...Robert Downey Jr(drugs)..Charlie sheen(abusive)...lil wayne(drugs..baby mamas)...DMX(everything)...James Brown(drugs..abusive)...Keith Ledger(drugs..death) ...etc...Let Chris Brown LIVE..show LOVE. We a village right?

Ms. Penn said...

Brooke, your blog was expertly written, and so true! We all have people in our lives who we forgive, and those we don't. We don't HAVE to do it, but no one is above it and we all deserve to forgive and be forgiven.

And there is alot of hypocrisy out there. This blog isn't about if we should forgive Chris Brown over Kobe or any other celebrity. This is an issue of being human. The only difference between us and them is that there faults are for the world to see...while we can sin in private. But just like we're wondering if CB was sincere, I'm sure people have wondered if an apology I've given was sincere or not. None of us is perfect, who we support is an individual decision and no one has to like it or be happy with it but ourselves.

KP said...

Hey Folks...

Brooke, all I can say is AMEN, AMEN, and AMEN!!! to EVERYTHING you said. Beautiful, inspired and well-written.

Rameer, Rameer, Rameer... lol. Rameer and I have been going back and forth on this. I will say that in re-watching the performance with his insight to some background, it is possible it could have been made-for-tv drama, or it could have been real. Not sure. I could have sworn CB said/mumbled something at the end of last night's performance though-- could that have been edited?

Anyway, what I will say is that the fact that he had a hard time claiming his wrong, to me, speaks loudly to his feeling of injustice which would imply a certain someone is not as completely innocent in that whole ordeal as initial reports would have us believe. But to argue over details that none of us were there for is mute at this point. The dude did the crime, he did the time, and now it's up to him not to repeat his offense. Remorse or not. But I do think he gets it. I do think he is sorry. And I pray for the sake of any woman in his stead that he doesn't repeat it.

Good luck to him and good luck to all of us with our iniquities of various levels. Like Brooke implied, to be able to forgive is a gift that leaves peace in its stead.

PS: Forgetting is a whole 'nother animal, but we won't go there, will we? lol

Courtney said...

Brooke, you are brilliant. That's all I have to say about this blog.

I won't get into the back and forth of who should or shouldn't be forgiven, because at the end of the day, the only person who needs to be able to look in the mirror and sleep at night is you - and the only person any of us has to answer to is GOD.

Great blog Brooke!

Yolanda said...

Lord knows I did some isht at 21 that I wish I could take back or handle differently.

BTW, good blog @ CNN, DMoe! Um, they hirin?

LOL

@Rameer - nice blog :-) (hee hee)

Rameer The Circumstance said...

Yes, KP and I have gone back and forth. I actually love going back and forth with her on a topic, cuz she tends to really give a good perspective and doesn't hit me with bullcrap like many others do.

And let me be clear, although I don't think you were talking directly referring to me, Brooke-Ra - I personally have NEVER asked anyone to like someone. As a Kobe Bryant fan, I understand when people don't like him - I DON'T comprehend when people let that dislike turn into flat-out hating and denial of truth. As Brooke-Ra said - Chris Brown dancing well is like Kobe Bryant hitting an impossible shot - it's simply what they do. You can give credit in ability and talent without liking someone - and I don't think I've EVER tried to make someone like a celeb based on their faults.

As far as sins go - well, I'm just honest. Some sins are more par for the course than others in the celeb world, and I understand that. So I call unadulterated BULL when someone calls Kobe Bryant out for adultery and uses that as a reason to support their dislike, but doesn't do so for Carmelo, D.Wade, T-Mac, LeBron, Carlos Boozer...well, pretty much name any other star NBA player or athlete for that matter. Same thing with him being cocky and/or arrogant - it's par for the course. No matter how many times I compare players words and actions, some people are simply against Kobe. So be it - but I will call out hypocrites at ever corner on that ish.

Some of the things celebs do - MOST, regardless of how some of y'all might try to fool yourselves - I simply HAVE to separate to be able to enjoy the entertainment. But there are some things that I cannot let go, and I already named some of the more reprehensible things- one that stick out from even the dirty world of celebrity norms.

And as I've stated in the past - I personally don't agree with the whole "need" to forgive. But I expect people who do forgive any and everything to not do so cuz someone hit a jumper, made an ill song or danced their arse off. THAT shouldn't be the impetus. And that is EXACTLY the impetus for many people, whether they want to admit it or not. Trying to make-up things to justify why dude should be forgiven, as I've seen people do on FB today, is pure caca to me. Cuz I REMEMBER what you were saying just a few days ago. I REMEMBER what your thoughts were. And I Know the only thing that changed was the dude did a dope performance and cried - which I'm not foolish enough to believe was completely sincere. Oh, it COULD be - I don't believe there's no chance it WAS sincere.

But as Brooke-Ra said - time will tell.

The whole human argument falls short for me. I can post a gazillion things of what being "human" is - one of which is slaughter. What works for and is good for some humans doesn't apply to others.

Racism is human. So is hate. And love. And forgiveness. And nonforgiveness. Let's not confuse individual beliefs and moral codes with what is and isn't human. I watch MSNBC's "Lock Up" all the time. You know what?

The activity that got all those men behind bars is HUMAN.

Stef said...

Brooke, what is being human to YOU?

KP said...

@ Rameer: I concur.

Brooke said...

@Stef,

Being human to me is all the things Rameer named. Love, hate, jealousy, rage, sadness, pedophilia, adultery, rape, murder, compassion, intelligence, humility, integrity, spirituality, etc. All of that is human. And some would argue that all of us have human capacity for ALL of those things in our lives.

So if you are human, you automatically are capable of being forgiven. That doesn't mean that you'll get it...because all of us are different and believe different things. That's ALSO what makes us human...having the ability to think for ourselves and have the free will to do (or NOT do) what we want. I'm not telling anyone that they HAVE to forgive anyone - I think I stated that in the blog. But we're all CAPABLE of it. I think it's safe to say we've all apologized for something. I think it's also safe to say that we've chosen to forgive some things/people, but not others. THAT is what makes us human. And if you know one day you may have to ask for forgiveness, then all I ask is that you keep that in mind while you're condemning someone else for something they did. This blog is not about Breezy, Kobe, or anyone else. It's about US, as individuals...and how any of us could just as easily have a meltdown. I'm not here to judge if his tears are fake or real - the bigger picture is we've all shed tears about something we did and regretted...and if we're going to ask for mercy, then at least be willing to give it at some point in your life.

DMoe said...

Rameer,

That "human" thing is exactly what makes the very nature of "forgiveness" what it is.

I find it funny how as humans we not only judge/quantify certain people for their sins/misdeeds, but we also judge their apology to other humans.

People can say their sorry all they want, but the true remorse lies within the actions taken beyond the original mistake.

@Yo -

Thanks alot for reading my blog! That means alot since I love yours...Hiring? I'll say "kind of", but it depends on the area...

Dmoe

Stef said...

I agree with you Brooke, forgiveness takes a strong person. Not all of us are built like that.

Brooke said...

@Stef,

NONE of us are built like that, that's where the saying "To err is human, but to forgive is Divine" comes from. The only true being (depending on your beliefs) who can forgive unconditionally is God. That's why it's so hard for us, and that's why it's not really left UP to us. Like Courtney said, the ONLY being (again, depending on your beliefs) that any of us have to answer to is God. It can't be left up to us, cuz humans will get it wrong. We have the capacity for it, but we don't always do it.

Most of us can't forgive because we shift our shortcomings on to someone else. If we forgave, that means we'd have to take the time forgive the very faults we can't bear to see in ourselves.

Some of us can't forgive cuz we'd simply rather feel bad or angry. We hold onto anger and hate like a set of credentials. But if you do that, it can literally make you sick. Forgiveness isn't about condoning an action, justifying it, or even forgetting. It's about setting yourself free so that anger and hurt and bitterness don't consume you so you can move on to something better in your life.

Rameer The Circumstance said...

I get what you're saying, Brooke-Ra.

I find that sometimes on the blog, there's this "wax poetic" moment where everyone talks of how it *should be* and what it could be like - and while it's positive and I think necessary at times, I never lose track or REALITY. And I personally believe that at times we take these Utopian viewpoint and use it to say that if someone doesn't see that then they're somehow not strong, or focused, or grounded, or whatever. And I simply don't believe that - we are all different, and have different ideals, moral codes, etc.

There are many things that I think can be agreed upon as reality, and there are others that have a gray area. Forgiveness definitely is gray for me, cuz when I read some of what y'all write, it simply doesn't apply to everyone or every case I know. I can think of people I have never forgiven and probably never will, and I'm FINE. No hate. No holding on to ill feelings. They're simply out of my life, and it's for the best.

And I do think there are a great many things that can be forgiven. But some can't depending on the individual, and some won't. I'll more than likely never forgive someone who does wrong by certain members of my family, depending on the transgression. Such is life. Many who know me know I'm more at peace with life and the decisions I make than a majority of the average people.

And when and if I choose to not forgive someone, I fully realize that actions I take my cause me to not be forgiven. But then again - I consider what I do before I do it ALWAYS. So that's never taken for granted - if I do something and am not forgiven, so be it. As I a man, I can accept that and move on, knowing that my actions caused that response.

Thus, I never look at a chump like Chris Brown and have that thought. If I lied to my mother tomorrow, and she chose to never forgive me - unlikely, but still a possibility - I knew before I told the lie what the extreme possibilities could be. I was taught to consider the consequences, and make your choice as such.

And I have...and do. Such is life.

Stef said...

well, we all can't be perfect.

I totally get your point Brooke. And I love your point about people picking and choosing who they want to support, but condemn others for who THEY choose to support or not. So with that said, if you want to not like Kobe, then DON'T! LOL!

Brooke said...

@Stef,

LOL! It's not like I "actively" don't like Kobe. I enjoy watching him play. If a Lakers game is on, chances are I'll watch it. But do I have Kobe jerseys and posters on my wall? No. Will I ever? No. Do I scream his name at the tv when he makes an impossible shot? No.

I would never say Kobe doesn't deserve my forgiveness. I'm nobody to him and he's done nothing wrong to me. But that doesn't mean I respect him. I think he put himself and his wife's life in danger and that he's reckless. Naming 100 other players who have done the same thing means nothing to me...cuz I wouldn't respect ANYONE who did it. But Kobe deserves a chance to be better just like anyone else does. I just have a certain feeling about him, but I wouldn't call it hate, or even dislike. It's almost indifference. He's here for our entertainment, and I can respect that.

I just hate when people tell me I should "get over" it cuz the boy can play. That's like saying "so what O.J. killed 2 people, that man is a hall of famer!" The same men who tell me to "forgive" Kobe are the same ones who'd go to jail for murder if some dude came home to their daughter after hittin' it raw with some random chick.

I just find it funny that someone can tell me to LIKE Kobe cuz he's good, but then says that you can't FORGIVE someone for the same reason. It's complete hypocrisy.

Rameer The Circumstance said...

I mean - honestly - you find people telling you to LIKE Kobe Bryant? That's a bit extreme to me.

And my point isn't that Kobe should be forgiven cuz he's good (not that you were saying that) - my point is that certain reasons for disliking him by some are bull to me, cuz those same reasons can more than likely be applied to other athletes that people like. So when I hear someone go on about how they love D.Wade but hate Kobe, I'm literally like "what the hell is the difference between the two?!?" They act alike in attitude AND actions.

As for your final comment - if anyone tells you to like Kobe Bryant cuz he's good but not forgive someone for the same reason, they ARE hypocritical. Period.

Brooke said...

I agree. No one one this blog has done it, but I know people who tell me literally that I should get over it...without even knowing why I'm not his biggest fan. They just assume that it's because of the adultery thing.

And honestly, that's not even why. I assume all NBA players cheat on their wives. Hell, I assume most men PERIOD do it. Not ALL, but ALOT. Same with women. But if you're going to do that, be safe and smart about it. Don't hurt anyone else, even if you don't care about your own life.

I'll break down these points to people and they'll say..."oh, so what...big deal, everyone does it." But the same cat would be walking around the hood with a greased up baseball bat if Pookie did that to their sister. It's like Kobe gets a pass cuz he can ball. If Kobe is just a man, so is the next dude down the street.

Jay said...

You know Brooke, it's funny. I might catch heat for this, but this is my observation.

If we were talking about a woman doing her man dirty like Kobe did his wife, most men would be less forgiving. But because Kobe entertains us, and frankly...cuz we're men, some of us look at him cheating on his wife as no big deal. Most men give Kobe a pass cuz he can play and we're sports fans. We don't care what he does to his wife or family, cuz we can relate...especially if we're a cheater ourselves. So when we hear women say they don't like Kobe, it sounds like hate to us...when in reality, I don't blame you for not respecting him. The only thing men will cop to is that he shouldn't have been a bitchass when he tried to throw Shaq under the bus.

I love to watch him play, but he gets no cool points with me either. I love his work ethic, and no one can see him on the court right now. But I would never tell someone they needed to like him - cuz dude was foul.

Same with Tiger, Breezy or anyone else who has a problem with what they did. Cuz like you said, if some dude plays my daughter or sister like that, I'd be ready to kill them...and wouldn't care how good they were at their "job" - no matter what it is.

Stef said...

Exactly Jay!

If he had given his wife Aids or herpes, at that moment, it doesn't matter what kind of jump shot he has! No one would care, cuz at that moment, shit is REAL!

Rameer The Circumstance said...

I had this convo with a kid recently, about not idolizing athletes or celebs. I told him most do bad things, and he should look to people he knows as idols and/or role models.

I told him if he wanted to admire something about Kobe Bryant, admire his commitment to being the best and his drive that gets him there. Admire how he excels within the sport - but don't look to his personal life as a barometer of what a role model is. Cuz almost every "celeb" he will look at will disappoint him if he scratches beneath the surface.

I personally respect when people don't like anyone for whatever reasons and stand-fast in their beliefs and virtues. But I HATE when people make exceptions just cuz they like someone - Kobe's wrong-doings ain't okay cuz he's the best b-ball player. Chris' transgressions ain't cool cuz he's a dope performer. And Bill Clinton's actions aren't forgettable cuz he was president.

We have to separate what a person does in their career with them in their personal lives oft times in the celeb/famous world. So yes - I like really great people like Angela Bassett in totality, but like others like Jerry Rice because of his skill within the sport that entertains me. Like I once told my baby sis years ago - if I based which entertainers and celebs to like off of their personal lives, I wouldn't like ANY of them.

Unfortunately, I find it necessary to separate many things, due to the culture of fame (another blog for another day). I don't co-sign or defend ANY bad behavior; wrong is wrong. But then again...I don't make excuses for that bad behavior simply cuz I like one celeb moreso than another.

But to get moreso to topic...and I know this isn't YOU in the least Brooke-Ra - but the hypocrites KILL me. Whether they support Chris or Kobe - I hate that ish.

Stivell said...

F*ck Chris Brown..Let his G-d forgive him!!

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