Friday, January 9, 2009

TGIF!!

Now remember yesterday when I said I wanted another Guest Blogger this month? Well guess what!? I got one!

He goes by the name of Craig...Craig Verde :-) Once you read the blog you'll know why :-) He asked me to include this clip in his intro...so without further adieu!



Hello Peoples!

I’ve been asked by the great Brooke to Guest BLOG. This is my first time in this forum. But being as though I missed Random Thursday...I thought we’d revisit the concept today and do RANDOM ‘RIDAY!!!!

Blogging has become the staple of the Internet. A forum to regurgitate the minute details of our Road Running lives. I’ve been trying to think of what the hell to write about. Relationships…I’m a hermit…Food...I’m a semi-quasi-vegan, but only during the week … Sports…unathletic …Music…tone-deaf …Movies…I can’t afford movies in NYC, too damn expensive!!! A matinee is at 10am…WTF??? …Maybe I should do a blog about NETFLIX? Nah…So many topics to make your brain melt and ooze out your nose giving you the Roscoe” look (Please reference Comedic Series MARTIN, pronounced as “Ma-In”)

But for me, the only thing that’s in my head is the word “BLOG”.

So I’m stuck…;-(

Now, I’m what you call a GREEN PEACE ACTIVIST. We’re a world-wide organization that spreads the word of peace and sharing in a ceremonious fashion. So what I did was ACTIVATE my GREEN to emanate my PEACE (Please take a second to digest this)

So, as I indulge in my aromatic ceremonies, I began meditating on the word BLOG.

Blog….Blog….Blog…I kept saying to myself…What the fuck? After a few moments, I found myself inhaling a spiritual essence. The feeling after you do yoga for the first time and you get to the part where you gently lay on your mat and rest…AND YOU’VE BEEN DESPERATELY WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT SINCE YOU THINK YOU PULLED A GROIN DURING DOWNWARD FACING DOG. Now, as you lay on the mat, the chants take you away to another place…mmmmmmmmm….Yoga….What am I talking about? Oh right…BLOG. But I found this YOGA essence in the word Blog. Then it hit me…I’ve just created BLOGA….Yes! This is a Downward-Facing BLOG!

Say the word BLOGA ten times. How do you feel? Funny? Initially. Stupid? Probably.

Well, I said it 87 times. And in doing so, I became one with BLOG. I realized how many ways we can incorporate it into our lives.

So in my BLOGA mindset…Here are some examples to use the word BLOG as a verb:

Pretty woman walking down the block: “I’d BLOG the shit out of her!”

Ugly woman walks down the block: “Damn, she looks like a BLOG

And for SOME of you gentlemen…

Pretty Man walks down the block: “Hmmm,…he would so get the BLOGness!”

Just jokes people…. don’t get Ralph Tresvant on me…:-/

So I walked into Starbucks the other day…Laptops and Cappuccinos in abundance…Tight pants and long legs crossed…and these are the men mind you (Again…No Ralphies)…It was unusually loud this day…eardrums bumping to the orchestraic (you can make words up in the BLOGOSPHERE!!!)…now…the ORCHESTRAIC sounds of clicking keys coming from every direction. I don’t mean to be prejudice or racist but I shook by head and under my breathe I uttered the word….”BLOGGAS” Leave it to BLOGGAS, to write when not written to….give you their two cents when you didn’t ask for mutha fuckin’ change….MUTHA’ F’IN BLOGGAS! Don’t get me wrong…I Looooove TYPISTS! Manicured hands…sanitizer gel sitting on the desk, right next to the NIVEA lotion (Personally, I think Nivea is too oily but I like the name so…there you go…) but boy I hate BLOGGA’S! (That was my Chris Rock impersonation by the way)

Side bar: Starbucks smelled like ass. You know why? Because Motha Bloggin Blogga’s only communicate through their computers! They don’t talk…They look at a screen, and whisper the words to themselves as they write. Do you know that whispering makes your breath stink?!!! Now imagine a room full of over-priced coffee and the whispering smell of ass…Dunkin Donuts, here I come…

My head hurts and I don’t know what the hell I’m writing about. My hands have diarrhea. I must be out of my mutha’bloggin’ mind OR maybe you should be a “Green Peace Activist like me”…;-) Then this piece would be more interesting… ;-)

So let’s all come up with a sentence using the word BLOG…ENJOY AND HAVE A HAPPY RANDOM ‘RIDAY!!!!

-Craig

74 comments:

Brooke said...

I loved this! The reason why? It perfectly described what "blogging" is!

For those of you not familiar with where the word come from, it’s literally a shortened form of the term “web log” - a log of thoughts posted on the World Wide Web. Global self publishing, no editing involved (well…maybe other than spell check perhaps). Blogs are spontaneous expressions of thought, human self correction, can be amended in hindsight and do not have to allow for any ending in sight. They can have plots, be full of drama or they can be completely silly (as you can see by our guest today) LOL!.

When we bloggers blog, we blog NOW. Thoughts occur with no level of timeliness. Novelists can spend years committing to a book. Screenwriters labor of rewrites seeking perfection. Reporters have to wait til EVERY sources has been confirmed. But bloggers, our deadline is whenever the hell we say it is.

You end up writing about yourself most of the time since we have a relatively fixed point of view on our world…or maybe not so fixed if you’re a Green Peace Activist like Craig  Blogs are like diaries, except it’s not private. It’s instantly, sometimes painfully, PUBLIC – open for all criticism and/or praise.

Thanks to my sister and Amanda for encouraging me to do it. I feel exposed, it’s fun and it’s liberating. I love writing out loud!

P.S. my sentence with the word blog:

The cable guy has the nicest BLOG I’ve ever seen ;-) LOL!!

Just jokes…y’all, just jokes! Y’all don’t get my blogness…;)

Annamaria said...

WOW... For the first time in the history of Brooke's Blog.. I AM SPEECHLESS! Not one brain cell turning..LOL Zip Zero Zilch.... My ADD kicked in midway...LOL...

SOO I'll just leave it at BBBBZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ & a taser in your ear... (that was purely cause I know Nicole looks forward to me tasing..LOL)

Brooke said...

LOL!! I guess you had to partake in some Green Activities to have his mindset! I thought it was hilarious!

I'm sitting here trying to think of a way to incorporate blogging with tasing...just for you! LOL!

Anthony said...

okay - you know what? I have to stop smoking weed. This blog made TOTAL sense to me! I'm high right now! LMFAO!

brooke - you and this cable guy. Is he "blogging" you? that was my blog sentence! LOL!

Pretty Ricky What Dey Call'em said...

In honor of the ol' Skool Jammy Jam for Charity coming up on feb 6th... I am singing the Jermaine Dupri So So def remix of Jam on it...called "Blog on It"

Pretty Ricky What Dey Call'em said...

And if Brooke is blogging the cable guy..hope she uses a blogdom!

Brooke said...

LMAO!! hahahahahahahaha!

I am NOT blogging the cable guy! GEESH!!

(..but that was a good one!) LOL!

Anonymous said...

Hey this is cool. Next thing you know people will have their own secret language that can be used without offending anyone...

Craig n 'em said...

I'm proud to have a BLOG man in the WHITE HOUSE...we can do this all day people...

Annamaria said...

UNFORTUNATELY I am NOT able to get in the "PROPER" state of mind for this conversation....LMAO

SOOO I'm going to eat! lol

Brooke said...

I wanna hear Monica say the word "blog"...see if she says it like she says "doll" or "dog" - she has the heaviest Bronx accent I've ever heard! right Pranny!? LOL!

Maliek Ball said...

This is the craziest blog I have ever read.

Anyway, my tv died the other day and I had to buy a new one so my credit card is back-blogged right now. The guy at circuit city was pissing me off because he was trying to add cables and things with the tv that I didn't need so he was about to get blogged up.

If Brooke is indeed blogging the cable guy, a blogdom is essential because we don't yet know if he has a bump on the blog.

momo925 said...

This was hilarious... very entertaining! lol

Well brooke, while your blogging the cable guy and using blogdoms, be sure not to break the blogtress on the bed and instead of rope,maybe you could use those bloguffs you bought. ;-)

Brooke said...

That's what the blog I get for bringing up the bloggin' cable guy. If I WERE blogging him, I'd break his bloggin back, so he don't want none! Ha!

Craig n 'em said...

LMBO: LAUGHING MY BLOG OFF!!!

momo925 said...

now you're making fun of my accent?! lol

I don't have strong BX blogcent by the way! BX represent!

Maliek Ball said...

I don't mean to put your business out there Brooke, but I spoke to the cable guy. He said that he would tear your blog out the frame.

Karen(phillygrl) said...

this is too, too funny! & (Brooke, I KNOW you love FRIDAY!!) ..this Craig Verde should have maybe a feature spot for holidays or something, no? He's absolutely right, I created a Blog..what the BLOG for?! I work from home, have a toddler & am pretty much chilling at home all the time!!!..BLOG!!..I figured i'd blog about my thoughts, the world, this & that, etc....UMM...I have too much work & then baby duty in evening! no BLOGGING time( this can be read several ways)...Maybe I can relate to Craig Verde, b/c I was the 'nature girl' in college.. i.e. Karen Verde!!:-) --but Im GROWN now...left that in the past!..BLOG!..i think I'll reminisce abt it someday soon:-) enjoy the weekend guys!

Pretty Ricky What Dey Call'em said...

It's funny how "blog" is used very sexually..BOL (Blogging out loud). All of you have dirty minds...BMAO (Blogging my ass Off)

Jess- said...

Brooke, after blogging the cable guy you can give him a blog job.

Brooke said...

Maliek, you are killin me! LOL!

The cable guy couldn't tear my blog out the frame if he tried!

Craig Verde can blog whenever he wants to!

Brooke said...

Jess! Then we can blog about it in front of everyone while playing Taboo! LMBO!

I know, everyone has a dirty mind - when I said the cable guy has the nicest blog I've ever seen, I meant his...face! Ha!

Maliek Ball said...

Jess,

Doesn't the blog job normally come first? After that is bloggy style...

Jess- said...

It depends how much time you have... you can blog it before and after.

Rene The Harlemite said...

"Those who enjoy blogs endelve in great streams of consciosness"
-Rene Proverbs 118

Interesting blog to say the least.
To blog or not to blog that is the question that I ask to Blog!

Brooke said...

Please...the cable guy WISHES I would blog it...but I don't just blog anyone now. No blogging for at least 3 months :)

Rene The Harlemite said...

Deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez BLOGS!!!!!
Eat a BLOG! Biiiiiatch!
LBAO

Annamaria said...

Brooke after seeing the cable guy I'd give him a fast forward on the no blogging for 3 months!!!

Blog the shit out of his BLOG!!! :)
And then break his back...LOL

Jess- said...

I'm with you Annamaria. Let him know who runs this BLOG!

Craig n 'em said...

But NEVER EVER let a cable guy BLOG you in the BLOG! You'll be seeing STARZ for days!

Annamaria said...

WHAT IF HE HOOKS HER UP WITH A YEAR'S WORTH OF CABLE?????? THEN WHAT DOES SHE DO???? HOW MUCH BLOGGING DOES SHE DO??? WHERE IS HE ALLOWED TO PUT HIS BLOG???

Jess- said...

Craig- if he uses Eros she wont see that many Stars.

Free cable? she's gonna have to blog him for a long time cause if she stops blogging him he may cut off her cable and internet.

Annamaria said...

That's true..... BROOKE if you gonna blog the cable guy to hook me up with some free cable can you get me something in writing detailing how long I will have the hook up for???? Thank you!!! LOL

BTW: It is BLOGGING BRICK OUTSIDE! :)

Craig n 'em said...

Now, Brooke was kind enough to lend me her forum to BLOG about some pure BULLBLOG...So I gotta step in to defend her BLOGGER. It's sad how everyone wants to BLOG Brooke out for free cable? Only a bunch of BLOGGA'S would do some BLOG like that...

Straight up BLOGGAS!

Brooke said...

Thank you CRAIG!!! See how they are! I'm surprised they even saw this blog today...cuz BLOGGAS DON'T READ! LOL!!

What is Eros Jess? I'm afraid to ask with all this bloggin goin on!

Keefe said...

Craig,

You are a funny motherblogger!!!!

Annamaria said...

Listen I am in NOOO condition to be BLOGGING for my own damn free cable SOOO I asked Brooke to take one for the team & blog the cable guy & hook a sister up... MIND YOU SHE WASN'T BLOGGING COMPLAINING WHEN SHE SAID YES!!!!!!!!

Brookey I know what Eros is....LMAO...

Craig n 'em said...

Right Blog atcha Keefe. ;-)

Brooke said...

I said yes to the cable hookup, I never said I'd blog in order to get it tho. He hasn't asked me to blog yet, he's been nothing but a gentlemen. Not all men are interesting in blogging...which is refreshing from this kid.

Besides, if I let him have a taste of my blog, he'd never go away! He'd be bloggin me down in the street, bloggin up my cell, bloggin outside my door..can't have all that!

Anonymous said...

you aint got to blog craig .. you aint got to blog!!!

Craig n 'em said...

Oh Anna...Take one for the team? What team? Are you the KNICKERBLOGGERS? No..So what team you talking bout? When it comes to BLOGGING...you on yo own. Well, unless you're into MENAGEBLOGS...;-) Don't try to put Brooke out there to do your BLOGGY work! Get yo own DVR girl...;-)

Craig n 'em said...

I stay high, no lie, you know this...BLOGGIN!

Annamaria said...

I CAN'T BLOG THE CABLE GUY FOR FREE CABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I JUST CAN'T!!!!!!! LMAO

momo925 said...

MENAGEBLOGS!!!! HAHAAAAHAA

Anonymous said...

All I know is, I'm BLOGGING the cable guy up if he gets some of Brooke's blog!

I don't play that shit .... I mean blog!

Craig n 'em said...

You can do anything if you put your BLOG to it. You can do it Anna...Just set up and appointment (bet. 12 and 5). Wait for him. Answer the door in a NIGHTBLOG Cable guy answers. .He starts working...He bends down and you see the crack of his BLOG. You're turned off and turned on at the same time...Flirt a little...Show show him a little BLOG. He smiles...He stands and asks...Would you like to see STARZ? and you say...DOES IT INVOLVE BLOGGING? And the rest is a segment of BLOGOGRAPHY....

Annamaria said...

As much as I would love to join the ranks of Brooke & HER HOT BLOGGIN cable guy. I think my boyfriend & soon to be baby daddy would have a problem with me blogging the cable dude! LMAO

Craig n 'em said...

Anna, You can probably get away with a BLOG JOB...Maybe you can at least get the BLOGGIN channel for your little Pickney...

Keefe said...

Dude .. you are too funny!! I have 2 crumb snatchers so I know BLOGGIN very well.

Annamaria said...

LMBO.... I don't understand why Brooke can't blog the cable guy for me.. I mean she is going to blog him anyways!!!! This way Everyone wins... Brooke gets the cable dude. The cable dude gets him some Brooke & I get the hook up! lol

Brooke said...

Who said I wanted to blog the cable guy?! I just said he had a nice blog, nobody said anything about blogging him. If wanted to blog him, I would have blogged him by now! Why you tryna blog me out!? LOL!

Annamaria said...

COME ON THE CABLE GUY IS H-O-T!!!!!!! AND you said he is a nice guy...BLOG HIM! lol.. Get some in the 09!!! LOL

Brooke said...

I already TOLD you! If I blog him, he won't go away! And he's 25, he might blog me out...tryna blog me all night long! bloggin 2 and 3 and 5 times a night! I need my sleep! LOL!!

Annamaria said...

1. Just Blog him this weekend. It's going to be snowing tomorrow so you won't have anything better to do but to stay home & BLOG!!! LOL

2. Brooke I'm starting to think that you are SCURRED of the cable guy... TSK TSK TSK.. BLOGGIN SHAME! lol

Jess- said...

do you have TWC Brooke?

Brooke said...

Yes, I have TWC :-)

Ain't nobody skerred of the cable guy. I'm just not putting my blogging activities on blast on the blog!

Serena W. said...

First off this blog is extremely funny after being on hydrocodone aka Vicodin. I feel like a Green Peace Activist on this stuff. Anyway...

Craig this is bloggin funny...look what you bloggin started.

Brooke I think the cable guy needs to be a guest blogger and write about what he thinks about bloggin (use your inmagination on that one).

Thanks for the laughs and now I know why the bloggin Starbucks smells a lil funky sometimes...hee hee. Peace.

Anonymous said...

If you do Blog him, just don't let him experience The Lock! Then I really have to BLOG him up!

**saying to myself** I can't stand his ass.

Brooke said...

He can't handle The Lock - he would prematurely blog himself, and then he'd be embarrassed :-) LOL! The Lock is for men, not bloggins ;)

Anonymous said...

I already have that on lock (pun intended). No man (or woman - if you're into that) will ever experience The Lock again.

Brooke said...

Can a woman experience The Lock anyway? I dunno...and stop telling everyone my bloggin secrets!! LOL!

Annamaria said...

HMMMM I wonder how Anonymous can have "THE LOCK" on lock?????? I mean the way I see it IF anonymous really had "THE LOCK" on lock then the cable guy wouldn't even be in the picture...LMAO :)

Amanda said...

LMAO, LMAO, LMAO, LMAO, LMAO, LMAO, LMAO, LMAO, LMAO, LMAO!!!

YO!!! This dude is high out his mind!!! Hilarious!!!

Rene the Harlemite said...

I see a lot of trash taking has occured on here.

What's up with this Cable Guy stuff???

Brooke-Don't sleep on him being 25 years old. He'll have a lot of energy and will give you a run for your money and may trun you out.
He make you retire from Blogging. LMAO!

Time Warner Cable said...

brookey baby!

can i give you a triple play?
i have some frinds that want to play and it's not a phone, internet and cable.

you wanna test it out?

holler

Brooke said...

I see somebody has mad jokes.

uh...that's what I said Rene, I said he may blog me out! LOL! Ain't nobody sleepin on him, but ain't nobody skerred either!

I don't know how he became the subject of this blog, but really, I'M NOT BLOGGIN THE CABLE GUY!

Rene the Harlemite said...

Oh I see you did write that...Too many posts. I did not see that earlier. My Bad. Have fun with the Young Buck! Grab him by the Antlers!haha!

Brooke said...

You must have some blog in your eyes, that's why you missed it :-)

Malek said...

leave to Brooke to analyze the blog for us.....

I was getting high just from reading the blog.....

Annamaria maybe you should tase yourself...and jump start you brain....wait does tassing kill...if so never mind I like you.....

ALRIGHT ALREADY get off the cable guy....Brooke just did....LMAO just kidding Brooke.....hahhaha

Is this blog about the word blog or gettin your sneaky freaky on with the cable guy...I mean your bloggy bloggy on?... TMI

What is lock...I am totally lost....I feel like Annamaria...

Random thought....The Game is on tonight!!!!! yeah

The Eagles are gonna blog on Sunday!!!!!

Brooke said...

And when she says the Eagles are gonna blog on Sunday, that means WIN! ha! blog in dat ass!

I see y'all got my sister crackin jokes too! Very funny..ha ha!

Malek said...

Brooke you should have never brought up the cable guy...would if he read your blog ...you would hurt his bloggings.....

Brooke said...

I think the cable guy would be bloggered by all this attention ;) We just bloggin sh*t anyway :)

Malek said...

I'm blogged out...see ya....Brooke if you are still at work ....LEAVE...


call me.....

Anonymous said...

yall are BLOGGIN' STEW-PID. Just remember what you need to deliver on Sunday. I'm talking about my boy JN.

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