Friday, September 30, 2011
We haven't done one of these in a while, so I figured....why not?! Hopefully I didn't ask too many tricky questions for your "Friday-end-of-week" brains :-)
1. Does/Can a kiss give you an indication of how good…or bad…the sex will be?
2. Once a cheater always a cheater?
3. If you are dating more than one person at a time, and one of those persons gives you a gift or leaves something (a toothbrush, an article of clothing, etc) at your place – do you hide it before the other person you’re dating comes over, or do you leave it out with the understanding that you’re not exclusive?
4. Would you want to live with a prospective mate before getting married? If so, for about how long?
5. If you could watch a video of yourself having sex, would you want to?
6. If for some reason you could never again be sexually intimate with anyone of the opposite sex, would you seek such intimacy with someone of your own sex? If so, what would someone of your own sex have to be like in order for you to find them sexually attractive?
7. If you could either double or halve your desire for sex, which would you do? Why?
8. Have you ever been in love with someone you knew you couldn’t trust?
9. Has sex ever made you feel guilty?
10. Would you prefer a wild, passionate, turbulent relationship, or a calm, warm, consistent one? Why?
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Happy Hump Day!
Finish this sentence:
The older I get, the more difficult it is for me to _________________.
I'll go first:
The older I get, the more difficult it is for me to lose weight.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Finish this sentence:
If I were a boy, I'd ________________.
If I were a girl, I'd ________________.
If I were a boy I'd...
- pee standing up.
- probably wear the same one pair of jeans 4 times a week.
- have ALOT of sex.
- buy lots of condoms.
- fall in love. Get my heart broken. Then f*ck every girl in sight to get over the pain :-)
- hide text messages and take my phone to the bathroom with me, and still get caught anyway ;) - probably never change my sheets.
- probably have trouble dealing with my emotions because I was told to be a man.
- probably cry less.
- probably NOT call some girls back. And not for any reason other than I'm a guy.
- would play sports, and be really good at it. I'd still be smart tho ;-)
- be hung like a horse and a sexual God :-)
- be genuinely sorry but I’d keep making the same thoughtless mistakes and no one would be convinced that I didn’t mean them.
- put my foot in my mouth.
- try to be a man that would make my family proud.
- have integrity and be loyal.
- be a man of my word.
- hope that if one day I had a son, he’d be a better man than me.
Friday, September 23, 2011
I don't know what the weather is like where you are, but it's pouring here in the NYC. Sometimes there's nothing sexier than a rainy day....but not so sexy when you're at work.
If I were at home, I'd be bundled up on my sofa with fuzzy socks on, drinking hot chocolate and watching movies - that is....if I was alone. But if you've got a boo, here are some sexy rainy day ideas for you:
1. Make love all day. Even better if it's a thunderstorm. Nothing is sexier than that.
2. Cook together. We always want comfort food when it's cold and rainy outside, and cooking together creates an intimate experience. Hook up a steak and potatoes, feed each other...then work it off later if you know what I mean. Have each other for dessert :-)
3. Take a long, hot bath together. Light some candles, put on some Prince...Sade....Jill Scott - whoever does it for you on sexy days like today. Just relax, be a little romantic and wash each other. Dry each other off, and follow it up with an oil massage. Many sexy things can begin in the bathtub.
4. Make it a romantic movie night. Pop some popcorn, break out the candy, cuddle on the couch and watch Love Jones. ("I love you...that's urgent like a muthaphucka.") You might have to put it on pause for a nookie break ;-)
5. Dance together. Dim the lights, or turn them off completely, plug in your iPod to your stereo and hit the "slow jam" playlist. Hold each other close and let the music move you. I'm getting a little tingly just thinking about it ;-)
What are your favorite, sexy things to do on rainy days? I'll look to DMoe for the rainy day playlist...Go!
Thursday, September 22, 2011
- RIP Troy Davis. Such a sad turn of events. An injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. It could easily happen to any of us. Send up prayers for peace and healing.
- As Princess would say, I'm hungry like the wolf!
- Time heals all wounds. People think it is holding on that makes you stronger, but sometimes it's letting go.
- Name some good side hustles - I want to buy a house.
- This week is creeping by.
- I haven't watched any new TV shows yet this season. Anyone watch X-Factor last night?
- Getting my car inspected Saturday before my Godson's birthday party. Car stuff is a pain, but glad I got some good wheels!
- People keep complaining about the new Facebook but it hasn't hit my page yet...wondering what all the hoopla is about.
- Eagles vs. Giants this weekend - I hope Vick is okay to play! Otherwise, we're doomed with Kafka. E-A-G-L-E-S - Eagles!
- I want new boots. And a new winter coat. Maybe I feel this way because I'm in my office freezing!
- My eyebrows are crawling across my forehead...I need to get them waxed.
- So many birthdays coming up! I'm about to be broke!
- I haven't had a Snapple in over a week - so proud of myself. Snapple is CRACK to me.
- What I DID have though, was a frozen apple martini (Texas size) from BBQ's that "accidentally" had a triple shot in it. I was promptly laid out on my ass. Never again.
- In honor of my hangover, today's throwback :-)
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Sorry I've been MIA, but I've been a bit under the weather. I'm slowly making my way back, and thanks go out to Cable Guy for holding down Random Thoughts Thursday for me last week. But while resting on the couch, some thoughts of my own have been swimming around in my head, and I have to get them out. We'll just call today "Tidbit Tuesday" - I think Ant has these on his blog from time to time. I won't bombard you with them ALL, but here are a few things on my mind today:
1. Floyd Mayweather.
This guy is a clown. He's a great fighter, but he's a clown. Now we can debate that (sucker) punch all day. Was it legal? Yes. Should Ortiz have protected his neck at all times? Absolutely. But that shot was bitchassness at it's finest...and there seems to be no honor or sportsmanlike conduct in sports these days. I predicted Mayweather to win, and I still think he would have won sans sucker punch, but true warriors don't have to win THAT way. The punch, however, is neither here nor there - what I want to really discuss is the post-fight interview.
What the hell was that?
Now, Merchant screaming that he wishes he was 50 years younger so he could whip Mayweather's ass was ridiculous as well, but Floyd Mayweather threw a tantrum like a child - simply for being asked about a questionable shot. Any reporter/commentator would have asked him about it - and rather than answer the question, he danced around it, promoted himself some more and then blew a gasket like a spoiled brat.
He's supposed to be a professional athlete, so where was his professionalism? I understand he just won a fight - emotions and adrenaline are on steroids...but c'mon son. He was yelling at an old man who was doing what he always does...and made himself look like a complete ass in the process. What is even more sad are those who defend this type of behavior. Ignorance should NOT be the standard, and hood sh*t should not be celebrated. True champions know this and hold themselves to a higher standard. I call bullsh*t on anyone who thinks that was funny, cool or justified.
2. Ray J.
First of all, why does anyone even still care about Ray J - or Fabolous for that matter?
Okay, if you're a fan of either of these gentlemen, I won't diss you, but Ray J really needs to go sit his ass down somewhere. If you haven't heard the story, supposedly they got into a fight and Ray J recently went on the radio to defend reports that he got knocked the EFF out man! Take a listen:
Ummmm.....Ray J sounds crazy. And he's going to hire someone to "rape" Fab? Really? And he knows these people...how? He played himself. No wonder he's friends with Floyd Mayweather, b*tches of a feather flock together.
3. Ron Artest.
Speaking of playing oneself...here's...uh..."Metta World Peace"...is it?
4. Miss Universe.
Now they're saying she's not "really black." Fuckery.
5. Fantasy Football.
Congrats to Ant on whoopin' my butt in Fantasy Football...has nothing to do with anything, but I'll be back and victorious next weekend!
Bonus tidbit question of the day: Ladies - What type of guy would you NEVER date because you'd think/assume/swear he was gay (if you're heterosexual that is)? None of this means he actually is - and it's completely ignorant - but this came out of a conversation I had with my girl Su. My guesses?
- a "hair dresser." Not a barber...a "hair dresser."
- a figure skater
- a ballet dancer
- Fonzeworth Bentley
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Random Thoughts Thursday...by the Cable Guy!
Brooke isn't up to blogging today, so she said I could kick off RTT! Ahem....
- I hope Brooke has a great day. The rest of you too :-)
- Thick chicks are sexy.
- RIP to Brian Urlacher's mother. It kills me how some feel he should still play on Sunday, even though he just lost his mother. Imagine how you'd feel if your mother passed? Nuff said.
- I love my mother...dearly.
- We're in mid-September already - Christmas will be here before you know it.
- My son told me this morning that he wants to grow up to be "cool" like me. That's my man!
- Parenting is the biggest joy in the world, but only if you're up for it. If not, don't have kids.
- This Cougar tried to rape me the other day as I was installing her modem. I told her I only have eyes for Brooke and to keep it moving! You'd be surprised how many naked women answser the door waiting for the cable guy. Desperation is not sexy.
- That said, I do feel kinda sexy in my uniform ;)
- If it wasn't for football and ESPN, I'd never watch tv...and I'm the Cable Guy.
- My favorite game growing up was Dodge Ball.
- I need a new ride.
- The new Ms. Universe is BANGIN'! I don't normally pay attention to those things, but she can get it.
- Brooke is even letting me choose the throwback for today - this goes out to B!
Let's Get It!
- Cable Guy
Friday, September 9, 2011
Today's topic comes to me from a question asked in a forum I belong to on Facebook. The question was: Is it typically more difficult or easier to have committed relationships in your 30's?
I've had this discussion a few times with female friends mostly, and the answers varied widely. I'll give my answer based on my experiences, and you all can chime in with yours.
Ironically, the most meaningful (and monogamous) relationships I've had were in my 20's. I always thought your 20's were supposed to be your "free" years - a decade of discovering yourself, having fun and building your career. I never set out to settle down into a relationship with any one man, but somehow, that's where I always landed.
Then I hit 30.
Fresh out of a 3 year relationship, I wanted to take some time to breathe. Well...I've been breathing for the better part of 8 years now. Don't get me wrong, I've dated. I've met some great men and had plenty of fun. Male company is not something I lack. Finding a date is actually rather easy. It's that elusive "relationship" I was having a hard time with.
Maybe it was easier to get into a relationship in my 20's because I wasn't expecting to be in one. They always say, it's when you're not looking that you find someone. In high school, college and your early 20's, you don't really know what you want, so you probably don't weed people out as quickly as you do when you're 35 and know EXACTLY what you want. You're pretty much open to dating....anybody.
When I was 23, I'd date a man who wanted to explore things with me - build something that we could discover together. But once you start working, living on your own, traveling the world and establishing a life - you've then built a world that someone now has to fit into.
At 30-something, I had a cat...so if you were allergic, you either pop a Zyrtec or keep it moving. I live in NYC, and any man who didn't like the big city (or any area close to it) need not apply. And if he didn't want to get married (again) or have (any more) children, then the party is over. If you are "selectively honest," or faithful, there would be no more calls back. I'd simply disappear. Afraid of commitment? Time for me to go. End of courtship. The list goes on.
Having kissed a few frogs in my time, I've found that my "list" grows longer with time and becomes VERY specific. My tolerance for bullshit is at an all time low. You develop a list of "warning signs" that you know will likely lead to problems, and out of simple practicality you don't even bother giving people with these problems the time of day. It's almost involuntary.
The list of deal breakers gets longer as you get older, simply because you experience more things you don't want to be involved with, and you yourself have had more time to sort through your issues - and expect your counterpart to have done so as well.
I know myself better, I know what I can and cannot deal with, and I do a greater job at identifying compatibility with potential dates than I did when I was 25. Most importantly, I now know when to end things when they aren't working out rather than holding on for no reason. I don't have time to waste, and doubt I could do it even if I wanted to. At 38, I have to be true to myself. I simply can't help it.
But does that limit us in our quest to find our perfect (for us) mate? While I see nothing wrong with having a "been there, done that" attitude, are we blocking our blessings by being so set in our ways? Are we doomed once we hit 35 and haven't yet found "The One"?
I don't think so.
Just because it may get more difficult, doesn't mean it's impossible. For some, maybe it IS easier to have a real relationship in your 30's, because if both parties know exactly what they want and are in agreement, then no time will be wasted, no games will be played and they can get right to the business of building an inclusive life together.
I honestly think the things that make it harder for me to find a compatible partner as I get older aren't necessarily so bad. I'm finding that I have time to become my own person and discover the life I really want to live. I'm still learning to screen out issues and character traits that would eventually become problems anyway, so I'm dodging bullets left and right. While I think finding and maintaining meaningful relationships may be more difficult as I get older, I feel the quality of a relationship I WILL find will improve. Being selective, in my opinion, isn't such a bad thing...so long as the end result is a happy one.
What say you?
Thursday, September 8, 2011
- This weather is definitely "fall-like" already. Summer was OUT!
- We're having a company wide pizza party today. "Yay!" for not buying lunch, but "boo!" for having to really sign up for spinning today to work it all off :-(
- Annamaria has a book club and I'm in it! We're reading "The End of November" by Nicole Sharpe if anyone wants to read along :-)
- I haven't read a book in months....that's so sad.
- I want a Pepsi right now for some reason. Guess I'll go get water instead.
- I hate when people go thru my stuff.
- Jordan (Serena's baby boo) is gorgeous! His smile just melts your heart :-)
- I saw my Godson Lee this past weekend. That boy is a little genius. Love him!
- Hug and kiss the ones you love - and tell them you love them every day.
- I'm in meetings all day today...not fun.
- I've taken care of two plants for almost a year now and they're thriving. I've never been able to keep plants this long. I'm pretty darn proud of myself! I had a little bit of help though - shout out to Tanisha for helping me water them :-)
- I need to hit the lotto.
- Why do mothers work your nerves so bad? I love her dearly, but sometimes.......
- Never mind...I'm grateful for her.
- I can't believe we're coming up on the 10th anniversary of 9/11. Still praying for those who lost loved ones that day.
- Happy Birthday LockSmiff :-)
- Is anyone else sad that Det. Stabler won't be back on Law & Order: SVU this season? Just me? Ok.
- Don't let me forget to do my football picks today - SUpreme Fantasy Football League with Rameer in full effect!
- Today's throwback courtesy of our favorite RTT Playlist guru - D to the Moe!
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
The summer has unofficially left us. Here in the NYC, the warm weather has immediately made way for rain and sixty-degree temps. This time of year always reminds me of school. School always reminds me of sexy teachers. I've had maybe one or two actual sexy teachers during my schooling years, but that doesn't stop me from thinking about hot teachers with short skirts and glasses biting from apples.
In the bedroom, however, I've had plenty of teachers. I'm a willing and dutiful student. Sure I've taught and instructed, but the ones that teach me always have a special place in my memories. The behind-the-door teachers are the ones that enlighten you to new things, make you try stuff you'd never try, or help you overcome the tension and just relax.
I had a bet with Poetry; she taught me physical education. Because of her I learned I could go down on a woman for an hour or more…and enjoy every second.
Satin was very sensitive and an extremely loud screamer. I learned how to be extra gentle. I learned calligraphy. How to coax and easy stroke and get great results. How to make her shudder without hitting her with the "poundcake" which almost had the neighbors calling the cops.
Pree taught mass communication. There's no time like the present and a closed mouth won't get fed so if you want it…you better speak up and ask for it.
BJ helped me realize that it was ok to fly the freak flag and just be me. I learned to say whatever I like in the bedroom…and there's nothing like revenge sex. I guess we'd call that philosophy.
I learned how to handle two courses at once from Honey Rider and Phoenix. While Honey Rider taught Yoga - the brilliance of flexibility and stretching - Phoenix was learned in the importance of a great cheerleader and persuasive communication.
Mercedes taught Swimming. My first coed shower. I learned how to share the water…while doing the breast stroke.
Ebony was the professor of city planning. Do it wherever you can.
Those are just a few of the courses I attended. I've learned tons and had lots of great teachers. What about you? What have you learned sexually? What have you taught?
School is in session…there's the bell…
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Happy Random Thoughts Thursday!
- This weather (post Irene) has been splendid!
- I love the Fall - but sad summer is coming to an end :(
- I feel like shopping for boots. Nothing good can come of that.
- Do any of us really care why J-Lo and Marc Anthony split up? It's sad, kids are involved, yada yada yada...but a full media sweep starring Marc Anthony? C'mon son.
- I'm so happy for Beyonce and Jigga - she looks so cute preggers!
- Anyone wanna spot me a Rock the Bells ticket? ;)
- Having Naya for lunch today - and it'll probably taste even better since it's the company's treat! Gotta love lunch meetings.
- Anyone have any show ideas they wanna toss out there?
- Picking up my family from JFK this Sunday...counting down the days! I missed them so much!
- I feel like I've been thirsty all week!
- Gonna go spinning tonight...on the wack new spin bike. I want the old ones back - I wonder what they do with them. I'd love to have one in my house.
- This week's throwback!